Who Watches the Ninja?
by Author of Doom Rin
Summary: Naruto crossover. Because you just know the Watchmen would have made great ninja. The lives of the Watchmen if they were born in the world of Naruto. Hidden Leaf is in for a wild ride. ComedianxSilk Spectre, DanxRorschach
1. Minutemen Graduation

After watching and reading Watchmen, I couldn't help myself, and started thinking of crossover ideas for Watchmen and Naruto. A single thought occurred to me. Wouldn't the characters of Watchmen, particularly Rorschach and the Comedian, have been better off for being rewarded for their work? Where wearing masks is commonplace and fights are expected? Where bad tempers are trained to constructive purposes and children can leave their families and be considered adults at the age of twelve if they become ninja?

These are short glimpses of such a world.

Be warned, lots of spoilers for both Naruto and Watchmen.

In this crossover, the characters from Watchmen have been born in the Village Hidden in the Leaves. They will retain their Western names, and all Japanese names will be organized western style, Kakashi Hatake rather than Hatake Kakashi.

I hope you enjoy.

I do not own Naruto, nor Watchmen.

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**Who Watches the Ninja?**

by Author of Doom: Rin

**Part One: Minutemen**

* * *

This may just be the best day of Eddie Blake's life.

The worst so far was a year ago, eye blackened by a paternal fist, finding out that the pale raven-haired beauty in the other class he's been crushing on for weeks was really a boy.

Yesterday had been bad too; finding out his best friend – Jiraiya - won't be on the same genin team.

But right now he's far from that, body and face bruised but triumphant, adrenaline still coursing through his veins.

Top of the class Sakumo Hatake is sulking and tied to a post.

Shido Inuzuka-sensei's mouth is a little bloody – hell yeah his genin fist did that – but one corner quirks up a little.

"Not bad." The jounin says, to all of them. "Not bad at all."

They made it. Eddie is going to be a ninja. He's going to kick butt and take names. He's gonna have girls all over him, make a name for himself. He's going to make enough money to move him and his mother out of his asshole father's house.

But best, best of all is Sally Jupiter in her yellow dress, grinning and eying him speculatively.

It starts here.


	2. Chakra Paper

Yeah, this chapter is short.

I changed the category from crossovers to mainstream Watchmen because of higher traffic.

This is the plan for Who Watches the Ninja? is this: three parts, zillions of small chapters.

Part One: Minutemen, mostly of Eddie and Sally.

Part Two: Watchmen, mostly Rorschach and Dan

Part Three: Naruto's generation, and how the Watchmen characters' presence has changed things.

Expect Part Two to be magnitudes larger than the other bits.

Enjoy!

* * *

Eddie stares at the little piece of chakra paper in his hand.

Sakumo's piece is crumpled up. He balled it up and chucked it at Eddie's head, but the bulkier boy caught it before it could make him look like a fool.

Sally's got soggy and dissolved in her hand. She grimaced and wiped her hand off on her dress.

Shido-sensei's turned to dust.

He watches, concentrates his chakra and channels it through the paper.

It burns.

Nice.


	3. Like You Mean It

Biggest chapter so far.

Part One is complete - 18 chapters total.

21 chapters written and counting...

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"Y'know, Eddie." Sally says with eyes narrowed, "I'm getting tired of you pulling your punches on me." Her pretty calloused hands are propped up on her hips, screaming indignation.

"Jesus Christ, Sal." Eddie says, all tight smile, "You're a girl an' I'm not gonna just go out and cold-cock you." Shido-sensei snorts a few feet away, standing there as a kind of mediator for his two students.

"Sakumo fights me all out – he doesn't underestimate me." She says coldly. "...Even if I never win a round against him…" she adds in a mutter. Sakumo is off training with his father – something about a family summoning contract or something.

"And Sakumo's a fucking genius so whoop-de-doo for him." He sneers.

Their teacher intervenes.

"Eddie, I've noticed you always hold back in fights with girls. Someday you're going to come across a female enemy who's stronger than you and like as not, she'll kill you." Shido-sensei's brown eyes are intent. "That's something you have to change before this weakness costs you dearly."

Weakness.

They don't know the sick anger inside him. They don't know why he won't hit a girl like he means it.

It's not that he doesn't want to hurt them. He does. Hates kunoichi for saying no and hates civilian women for their weakness and hates Sally Jupiter for snapping at him when he's trying his goddamn best to be nice. Hate.

But he's not like his father, and Eddie Blake is never going to be, not if he can help it.

"C'mon Eddie. Hit me." She says, red lips and yellow dress and hard black boots and hair twisted just so with her forehead protector resting on her collarbones. "Hit me hard and prove to me that you actually mean it."

So he does. Bam, right to the jaw. His knuckles and her jawbone make a nice meaty smack.

Pulls his fist back, does it again.

And again, left hand this time.

Pull back…

Sally flinches.

Fists uncurl. He pats her swelling cheek solemnly.

"Eddie…" It's a warning kind of growl from Shido-sensei.

"No," he assures them, "I'm done."

He wins this time.

Sally's brown eyes meet his and just like that, he hasn't won, he's lost.

She spits saliva and what looks like blood at her feet.

Her eyes are blazing. Fuck, sometimes he thinks he loves her when she's like this.

"Better," she says, and leaves.


	4. Teaching A New Dog New Tricks

Short one again this time, but never fear - this is the last of the short ones.

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He's gotten over being soft on girls. But he learns a new thing – keeping a spar friendly but respectful. As respectful as he can get, anyway.

So yeah. Take your opponent seriously, but don't fucking hospitalize them.

He's awfully good at pissing people off. Learned it when he was a kid - back when his family still lived under one roof - directing his father's attention away from his mother and onto him instead.

Shido-sensei is tired of Eddie asking for C-rank missions, but Eddie needs the higher pay. He has his mom's rent to settle after all.

* * *

I don't know who told you I don't like reviews, but they lied.


	5. Badge of Humor

I don't own Naruto, nor Watchmen.

Twenty-three chapters written and counting...

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"Eddie. Here." Sakumo holds it out. It's round and yellow and has a dopey grin. Eddie stares. Several hundred yards away a dozen Leaf-nin die in a screaming blaze of chakra-enhanced fire. "Happy Sixteenth Birthday."

It's just like the silver-haired bastard to be flippant in the midst of the Second fucking Secret Ninja War. Sakumo Hatake had turned out to be a decent guy after all, at least after the first year of being a genin. Yeah he was a genius, and smug about it, and maybe he had a kind of questionable sense of humor (for instance, he did not get Eddie's jokes), but he worked seamlessly with Eddie, Sally and Shido-sensei as well as with his pack of summon-hounds, and that little trick with the tanto and visibly white chakra was _sweet_ as all get out.

Eddie takes the object and promptly stabs the needle of the pin into the fleshy bit of his thumb. He's been fighting in this war long enough to hone a battle hardened danger-sense. Problem is, once you get used to dodging mines and kunai and ninjutsu-of-widespread-death-and-destruction, you don't notice the little dangers.

He curses, and instinctively sticks the injured digit in his mouth. Pulls it out to inspect the damage, and drips a drop of blood on the smiling surface. It runs down the surface and stops, forming a hand that points at five minutes to midnight. Eddie wipes the thumb off on his pants and pins the badge right over his heart on his black chuunin vest.

"Where'd you get that thing anyway?" He wonders aloud, as earth explodes to the right of them. They cough a little in the ensuing dust cloud before Sakumo answers.

"Off a body. I was restocking." Sakumo's mouth quirks into a little grin.

"God damn." Eddie snickers. "What would you call that? Regifting?"

"Always the comedian, huh."

There's a crunch of rubble to their left. Not the sandals usually favored by ninja, but a high-heeled boot. Eddie knows those boots.

"What did you boys find to giggle about in a place like this?" Sally queries, wearing the battle dust and blood like some geisha wear a fine silk kimono. Eddie grins.

"Sakumo here just gave me my birthday present, Sal." She looks surprised.

"It's your birthday?"

"Yep. The big one-six." Sally's lips purse.

"Oh Eddie. Sorry - I don't have anything for you." He grabs her hand and plants a big, smacking kiss on the back of her glove.

"One date after this is all over, and we're square."

"You know I'm dating Rolf, Eddie." She says with a frown, pulling her hand away.

"Muller?" He snorts, "That boy is gayer than a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide."

"Stop it Eddie." She gives him a push, but her eyes are sparkling. "All right. One date."

Fifty yards away a band of enemy-nin are closing in silently. It's a quick transition they make, from playful teenagers to hardened warriors, one they're used to making. They don't know if they'll live to see the next dawn, but they'll die trying to.

Happy Birthday to him.

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I know you guys are reading this, please review?

It's not that hard...


	6. Naming Day

I do not own Naruto nor Watchmen.

Twenty-six chapters and counting...  


* * *

His generation makes a name for itself during the Second Secret Ninja War.

Team seven taught by Hiruzen Sarutobi, Orochimaru, Jiraiya, and Tsunade are known as the Sannin, or 'the three.' Many a ballad is written about these three.

Team four under Kazuki Ito is good, not as good as the other two though.

Rolf Muller is the Juggernaut, unstoppable once he gets his momentum going, all burly muscles and anger. He's also a faggot.

Nelson Gardner has no battle name. Eddie comes up with a lot of names for him, but none of them ever stick. Again, Nelly has no use for women.

Hollis Mason is Night Owl. He's created some crazy jutsu – one that lets him see in pitch darkness, one that lets him map out an area using echolocation. The owl part comes from his owl summons.

Team four is unusual in that it has three boys rather than two guys and a gal. Eddie figures it works out okay, though, seeing as two of them are flaming homos.

Team five under Shido Inuzuka are the best of the bunch, though, Eddie thinks.

Sally Jupiter is known as the Silken Spectre for her uncanny genjutsu and silent grace over the battlefield.

Sakumo Hatake is called the Leaf's White Fang for his hair and chakra, for his dogs and tanto.

Eddie Blake is known as the Laughing Death, because he laughs as he fights and kills and burns his way through the enemy lines.

He hates it. It's a stupid name.

So he spares one soldier, a weeping fresh genin he could easily off.

"You get the hell outta here and tell your fucking country the Comedian sent you, and I'm not settling for some half-rate name like 'the Laughing Death.' You hear?" The kid hiccups and Eddie shakes him like it'll shake some sense into him.

"Who am I?" He prompts.

"The Comedian." The baby ninja whimpers.

"Good." He pats the kid on the head. "Now get outta here and don't die until you tell them who sent you. Scram!"

The genin takes off.

A month later, bam.

Stupid name gone.

His commander doesn't approve of him sparing the kid, but no one's called him Laughing Death since.

* * *

I love reviews. Particularly when they are constructive criticisms, and don't choke on their own vitriol, like a certain anonymus reviewer. You know who you are, and you disappoint me.

* * *


	7. The Promised Date

Neither Naruto nor Watchmen belong to me.

Bear in mind, we are viewing Hollis from Eddie's perspective, not mine.

sorta semi-short chapter.

Part One is completed, expect updates once every five to seven days. There are eighteen chapters in Part One. Part Two looks to be shaping up nicely, and the chapters are longer than in Part One.

Oh yes, and the rape scene is coming up after this one.

Twenty-nine chapters written and counting...

* * *

The war's over.

Eddie started out fifteen and chuunin, and came out a legend, seventeen and ready to make jounin.

The war's over, and Sally keeps her promises.

So they go out on that date.

Rolf Muller isn't even a factor – he's been shacking up with Nelly for more'n a year now, and doesn't everybody know it, because Nelly is a screamer.

He gives her yellow daisies - she's allergic to roses – yellow like her dress, and takes her to that Wind-country restaurant because she hasn't been and he can afford it.

She laughs at his jokes and he keeps the comedy PG-13 rated so the restaurant staff doesn't ruin things by kicking them out. He doesn't act perfect, but he lets her see him trying to behave, and maybe that's enough, because at the end of the night she kisses him on the lips and reaches for the door.

"Let's do this again sometime," She purrs, moving inside. She licks her lips and closes the door behind her.

And hot damn. Best. Night. Ever.

Hollis Mason has been tripping over himself around Sally lately, all moony and shit.

Eddie's got his number, can smell lust all over the chivalrous boy.

Thing is, Mr. Owl can't win, because Eddie _knows_ Sally.

He's known her for five years now, knows her habits, likes, the whole damn list.

He knows she likes picking fights, likes him to hit her like he means it. Sally is a kinky girl, most kunoichi are, but Eddie doubts Hollis Mason would believe that, not when he's set Eddie's girl up on a pedestal to admire.

That pretty face may be flawless, but she's never been perfect for anyone but Eddie.

* * *

Positive reviews are adored, constructive criticism, be it positive or negative, is just as welcome.


	8. Spell It: R A P E

Neither Naruto nor Watchmen belong to me.

Hoo boy, big chapter. This update was late because I refused to update until I got over my writer's block and finished another chapter.

I'm changing the rating for this chapter.

Thirty chapters written and counting.

* * *

They've been sleeping together for maybe three months when Sally tells him about her rape fantasies.

Eddie knew she liked it rough way before that first date – that was the whole point of dating Rolf Muller, who liked it rough, but who also turned out to like it male.

…But rape. Real rape.

He knows he's a monster, has thought about doing… it, only female enemies, just a little extra victory, yeah? But a thought stopped him all those times when he could've, same one that has for years. _Sally_ _wouldn't like this_. And he's been trying to start something with her for so long that her opinion mattered. So he didn't.

_Sally wouldn't like me to rape women, but she wants me to rape her._

God, they're both sick in the head.

Half of all kunoichis get raped at some point or other, so why would Sally have a fantasy about it when it'll probably happen (though not if he can help it)?

"I want it to be you, Eddie." She says breathlessly as they finish their second round of the night. "Been thinking about it since you hit me like you meant it."

So he agrees. Beneath his disgust, there's a flicker of excitement that almost scares him. They'll do it carefully, plot out what's going to happen together, even a little research, determine safe words to say if it gets to be too much. She wants to do it outdoors, he insists on inside behind a locked door. They can be exhibitionists the normal way later, without adding in loud S&M role-play sex to the pile.

****************

Four days to go, and they're both getting excited about it. The sex is wilder, better than before, the anticipation is delicious.

****************

Tonight.

He's scared. Kind of.

*****************

She turns, dress half-off.

"Eddie? What the hell are you doing here? You knew I was changing."

"Sure I did. You announced it loud enough." Wire. Blunt-edge wire in his back pocket, don't forget it. There isn't a sharp weapon on him, he's made sure of it ahead of time.

"C'mon, baby. I know what you need. You gotta have some reason for wearin' an outfit like this." He's said those lines before, but those times before, she's said yes. Even if she _means_ yes, she's saying—

"Eddie, no."

"Sure, no. Spelled Y-E--" She rakes her sharp fingernails down his face, drawing blood, and part of him is pissed. They didn't plan that.

"Spelled N-O, Eddie!" He sticks to the plan, and slugs her in the solar plexus. Sally's breath comes out in a pained wheeze. She recovers quickly, and the crack of her slap echoes in the darkened room, light still streaming from the open closet. They're still and tense, staring at each other, the plan is the plan but somehow they've lost track of what they're supposed to do next.

"Eddie?" He snaps out of it and punches her in the face. While she reels he whips out the wire, grabs her hands and loops it around and around, restraining her.

Sally makes to kick him, and he dodges, punch aimed for her shoulder hitting her in the neck. With a loud yelp, she falls, catching herself on the small table, knocking a vase full of the flowers he got her onto the floor where it shatters with a crash. Eddie does not hear the front door slam open in the other room.

He grabs her by her long chestnut hair and drags her to the bed so she doesn't cut herself on the broken glass. Sally flops limply onto the covers, still struggling weakly. He reaches for his belt, as she whimpers,

"Oh. Oh no, Eddie don't…" But she hasn't said her safe word, hasn't said 'garden' so he keeps going.

"Sally? Sally, what's…" A third voice intrudes, trailing off in astonishment. Hollis Mason stands in the doorway, eyes wide before they narrow in hate. "You vicious little sonuva..." And then he's there, dragging Eddie off Sally, who stares at both of them in shock.

"Hey, hey! She asked for it!" The ninja gives an inarticulate scream of rage.

Hollis' fist hits Eddie square in the nose and Eddie gasps out "crossbow", because damn it, role-play time is _over_. Hollis doesn't know, that this is consensual, has no idea Eddie and Sally are together, and so has dropped the yellow roses meant for the battered woman in the other room, his fists pummeling into the stockier man's face.

"Hollis! Hollis no!" The fists stop. Sally drags Hollis off of Eddie.

"Sally, don't defend him! That little bastard just tried to- to!" Sally's eyes are pitying, and tired, and annoyed. Eddie's mouth is full of blood - from where he bit his tongue - but he's not going to spit it out in the bedroom and stain the carpet. He levers himself to his feet.

"Hollis, Eddie and I have been dating for months now. He wasn't raping me, we were… well, I asked him to, so it wasn't real." Eddie leaves them to it, Sally to explaining, Hollis to his astonishment. He heads to the bathroom and spits his mouthful into the sink. Looks into the mirror to examine those damn claw marks. Shouldn't scar, but hell, people are going to ask.

He pulls out a washcloth and cleans himself off. He rises the blood out, wets it again, and takes it with him. When he reenters the bedroom, Hollis is gone, the front door is closed, and Sally is slumped on the bed, staring blankly at the wall.

"Babe? Ya all right?"

"Fine, Eddie." She sighs, shaking her head. He sits down next to her on the bed.

"C'mere." He takes her chin gently and cleans her face with the damp cloth.

"Eddie." She says, eyes closing. He undresses her slowly, soothing her hurts with the cloth, following it with whispery kisses until she is soft and supple under his hands. Sally arches under him with a sigh, hands working on removing his clothes, kissing his neck, whimpering when he presses too hard on her already blackening bruises.

He leaves her briefly to wedge a chair under the doorknob of the busted front door, then closes and locking the bedroom door just for safe measure, before returning to his girlfriend.

When they join this time, there is no violence or tension. They've had their fill of that, so the love they make is slow, gentle and tender. Neither of them last long, adrenaline and hormones still coursing through their veins, and it's not long before they whimper their climaxes to the disheveled room.

She cuddles close, sucking in a breath when his hand finds the bruise on her neck.

"Was it what you wanted?" He wonders, fingers moving on to play with her hair. Sally shifts against him.

"Aside from Hollis?" She teases, and he snorts. "Yeah. It was good."

"Good." Eddie says, "'Cause I'm fine with rough, but no sparring in the bedroom for a _long_ time, babe."

"I don't blame you."

They pull the sheets up and drift into the deep sleep of the emotionally exhausted kind.

* * *

Reviews are greatly appreciated.


	9. Now

I own neither Naruto nor Watchmen.

Thirty-two chapters and counting...

* * *

Sally's face is pale and worried. She's got two fistfuls of her yellow dress bunched up in her hands.

"What's wrong babe?"

"Eddie. Eddie, I'm pregnant." For a second he's worried that it's not his, but she takes his burly hand in her strong but sweet one and all doubt flees as she places their hands on her belly.

"Well, hell." He says, searching for words. Sally flinches, her hand tightening.

"I know we didn't – never talked and – I don't... It doesn't have to-" She fumbles, eyes reddening and pretty face paling even further.

He's uncomfortably aware of the tiny box in his pocket. It's been there for _weeks._ Eddie's just been looking and waiting for the right time to do it. He's never been a romantic kind of guy, but he thought he'd recognize when it would be best to ask. Thought she'd say yes, anyway, or say N-O but mean N-O-T Y-E-T. He figures if he doesn't do it now, she'll think he only wants her for their mutual mistake.

So to hell with it.

He pulls it out and opens it.

"Now's as good a time as any. Marry me?"


	10. Trip and Fall

We are now half-way through Part One.

Part Two will be all about Rorschach and his team first, then Dan, and after an eternity, Dan will finally meet Rorschach... There is also a plot hidden somewhere in Part Two, and we'll revisit the characters of Part One every now and then. Part Two is also better written, in my opinion, so just hang on.

I own neither Naruto nor Watchmen.

Thirty-three chapters and counting...

* * *

Eddie grins whenever he thinks of that ring on Sally's ring finger.

She accepted his proposal, and they've moved into Sally's cozy two bedroom apartment. They've even fought over baby names – and settled on Morgan for a girl, and Carl for a boy.

Sally's due in six months when one night she shakes Eddie back into conciousness. Any grogginess flees as he registers the blood smeared all over the sheets and her thighs. Panicking, he throws some clothing on and bundles Sally up, sheets and all. He carries her bodily out the apartment, bridal style. The front door slams open into the wall, and drifts slowly closed on its own, he's already gone, running through Konoha's streets to the hospital, sticking to the ground because only an idiot would use the rooftops at this hour.

They must be quite a sight, as Eddie bursts through the emergency entrance's doors, half-naked kunoichi in his arms.

"She's pregnant, and bleeding!" He shouts, and this galvanizes the hospital staff. Finally, he lowers Sally onto the wheeled stretcher, and they're speeding through the white-washed halls, praying for the first time in years, that things will turn out okay.

Somewhere in between tests and holding his girl's hand through her spasms, the doctors draw him away to fill out paperwork and explain what has happened to her. By the time they're done, Sally has been moved to a room to recover quietly.

Her lovely face is pale and pinched, an IV drip drapes from its frame to her wrist.

"Babe." He says, and she turns.

"Oh Eddie." She says, and then crumples in on herself, wracked with sobs.

He's there, she's in his arms, and they're both crying. They were going to be parents, and the enormity of it hits him for the first time, just as this opportunity silently bleeds itself away.

"I couldn't even... keep the baby in me long enough." She whimpers into his shoulder, and he shakes her a little.

"Jesus Christ! It's not your fault. Wasn't anybody's. This changes nothing. I still want you, y'know." Sally says nothing, just clings to him, and they can't really do anything for the other except be there, and stay there.

They say life carries on.

And it does.

They'll get through this.

* * *

Reviews? Please?


	11. Coping

I own neither Naruto nor Watchmen.

Thirty-four chapters and counting...

* * *

The grief that follows the miscarriage ties them together in a way years of dating might not have.

Suddenly it's not Eddie with Sally. It's Eddie and Sally, as a pair. They are united in their grief, in knowing that they alone feel the same emotions, same pain.

If this hadn't happened, they might have broken up or divorced each other years later, but instead this has turned their bonds to finest steel, forged and hammered.

With the baby's approach gone, they extend the date of the date of the wedding in order to plan it better

Jiraiya is going to be Eddie's best man. Sakumo had been upset about that, but Jiraiya was like a brother to Eddie, and while Sakumo was a nice guy and all that, brothers came first. Sally was still trying to decide between Tsunade and her sister, but Eddie had a feeling the medic would win.

In the end, they cope with their grief by focusing on planning the wedding, even though sometimes Eddie can't believe he's having long discussions about flowers and place-settings.


	12. The Day

I do not own Naruto, nor Watchmen.

Six chapters until Part Two, which is focused on young ninja Walter!

Thirty-four chapters written and counting...

* * *

He's been jittery all Day. And it's definitely a Day, capitalization intended. It's a Day to remember, to archive in memory, something to pull out to warm oneself on bad days. He's thought of it being in the future for so long that Eddie can't believe it's really here.

He's just gotten back from a mission, the new scar on his cheek twisting his mouth into a permanent sneer. The young Hidden Rock kunoichi had been good enough to hit him, but not good enough to kill, and that was a difference that mattered. She's dead now, shame. Pretty girl, nice hair, brown eyes, small. Pity that.

Jiraiya nudges him in the side, and Eddie looks up from where he's standing at the altar, uncomfortable in his suit – the shoulders are a little too tight.

She's there at the end of the aisle, brown hair twisted and shining, white dress hugging her figure, beading sparkling in the partly-cloudy sunlight. Sally hangs on the arm of her father, who's never really approved of Eddie, but gave his blessing anyway.

Their eyes meet. Sally smiles, and it's like pulling away a silk curtain and filling the room with sunlight. Her smile takes that face from flawless to warm and alive and his.

Just like that, his tension is gone, replaced by a relieved sort of giddiness.

The priest opens his mouth and begins.

"Dearly beloved…"

* * *

Reviews are greatly appreciated!


	13. Victory

I do not own Naruto nor Watchmen.

Thirty-six chapters and counting, will update the next in two days, because this one is so short!

* * *

It's taken years to get to this moment, but it's here.

Countless attempts, tears when Sally had her period yet again, and two more miscarriages.

She's finally here.

And whoa, suddenly Eddie has two _she_'s to think about, two girls that rule his life.

She's red and sticky with unmentionable fluids and screaming at the top of her little lungs, kinda ugly and sort of squashed, but perfectly formed. Best damned good-looking baby he's ever seen.

"Morgan." Sally sighs, sweaty and flushed, loose chestnut hair clinging to her face. "Morgan Jane Blake."

"No." Eddie says, "Laurel. Laurels for victory."

* * *

One review, please?


	14. Real Mature

I do not own Naruto, nor Watchmen.

This is one of my favorites. It practically wrote itself, and I love finally being able to depict Eddie's friendship with Jiraiya because they're both immature, womanizing badasses, in their own way.

Enjoy!

Thirty-six chapters and counting...

* * *

"Shut the fuck up, man." Eddie says desperately, cringing. "We're in a fucking grocery store!"

"Eddie my brother! Not you too!" Jiraiya wrings his hands in mock-despair. "Tsunade is going to the hot springs and neither you nor Sakumo want to come with and peep? Marriage _ruins_ manly men – you're not like you used to be! Marriage ties you down, winds you around the finger of one woman, when you could have fun with the ladies and still be free!"

Hidden Leaf's Comedian glances at his daughter in the front of the grocery cart, hands white-knuckled on the bar of the cart. He only hopes Laurie will not pick up any new words from his best friend's speech. He's already gotten in trouble with Sally for swearing enough in front of their daughter. Enough times for her to pick up the f-word. Pick it up, and repeat it for more'n a week.

"And--" and Jiraiya is draping himself over Eddie's shoulder and now the store's other patrons are definitely staring. "I hear men do their wives' chore lists and don't even get enough--" He leans over with a stage whisper, "_sex_ as they used to. Yeah," the white-haired man nods to himself, "and married sex is completely bland."

"Bullshit," Eddie finds himself saying, "You know this how? 'Cuz it ain't."

"Really?" Jiraiya says, unbelieving.

Eddie grits his teeth and kind of nods, dying of mortification. After all those years of tormenting others with his sense of humor, karma is paying him back.

"'S better, actually." His best friend's eyes widen, and Eddie takes this as a sign to elaborate. "Once you get used to each other, you know exactly what they like. 'S like… like fighting with a kunai you're used to. Only using new ones means you have a sharper edge, but with an older one you know the heft, grip, and all it needs is a little polishing and sharpening."

"Hmm. Good point." Jiraiya concedes, "But don't you miss those virgin titties? Unspoiled by a baby's suck?"

Laurie claps her hands and squeals, loud enough for the store's customers to hear her in the next aisle, "Titties! VIR-GIN TITTIES!"

Jiraiya guffaws, and Eddie punches him, hard.

"Fucking hate you, man. You suck as a god-father, y'know."

"Ow. Not my problem, you picked me."

"Sally's gonna kill me."

"With what? Dirty diapers?"

"Yes."

* * *

One review, please?


	15. Of Dogs and Names

I do not own Naruto, nor Watchmen.

This is the beginning of the changes made to Naruto's world. The changes will grow in size as we go on. Only three chapters left for Part One! I'm very excited, because quality seems to be going up.

Thirty-seven chapters and counting...

* * *

Sakumo is in the yard surrounded by dogs when Eddie and Sally come for the monthly barbeque. What started as a chance lunch between three Jounin-sensei (forcing their nine students to eat lunch together at a barbeque grill) has become a bit of a tradition for the nine shinobi of the Sannin generation. As they became adults, they moved the food away from the grill in a restaurant, and to the grill in their backyards.

It's just Team Five this month, because the members of Team Four are all on missions, Jiraiya is off spying, and Tsunade had to call it off for an emergency surgery. Orochimaru is available, but he knows they only invite him out of courtesy.

"I'll leave you boys to it." Sally says to Eddie, heading for the house.

Sakumo has always been a very private person, but lately he's been drifting away from his team. He left for a two-month mission in Sea Country a year ago, and returned married to Sumire Kitoh, a Tea Country civilian.

Sumire is quiet, demure, and fragile in a way Sally and Tsunade will never be. She looks at her husband with a devotion that worries Eddie, because she watches Sakumo not with love, but total and utter hero worship.

She's also pregnant. After so much trouble conceiving, the nauseous moody pregnancy, and delivering Laurie, you'd think she'd be jealous of Sumire, who wears pregnancy well and easily, but instead the two women have bonded over shared tidbits of pregnancy and discussions of children and future children.

Eddie leaves them to their girl-talk, heading towards his former teammate. Sakumo is tending a pug dog with five pups clinging to her belly. Around him, a Siberian husky lays curled on the lawn next to a huge mastiff and a beagle. As Eddie, a Dalmatian raises its head to greet him with wet nose and long, spotted pink tongue lolling in a doggie grin.

If Laurie were here, Eddie thinks, she'd wave her chubby arms and squeal "Puppies!", and toddle towards them. And maybe fall on her face – at four years old she's still getting the hang of balance – which might require a cuddle and a kiss to make things right again. Eddie's still learning not to be embarrassed about showing affection to his child in public, but it must be part and parcel for ninja fathers, learning how to be a good dad and still be badass, and if they can do it he will too. Laurie is currently on a play date with a neighbor's kid, leaving her parents conveniently free for the barbeque.

"Eddie." Sakumo greets, nodding as Eddie plops himself onto the lawn next to the pug-bitch and her pups.

"Hey there, Whitey. Wassup?" Konoha's White Fang makes a face. It's Eddie's pet name for him, ever since Sakumo got his nickname. Eddie has nicknames for everyone, particularly his friends. Jiraiya is 'Gramps.' Orochimaru is 'Hottie', because he still is, and because Eddie is one of the few people who can get under his skin anymore. Tsunade is, inevitably, (but only from a distance) 'Boobs.'

"Kite has a new litter, as you can see. They needed names, so most of them are named, except this little guy." He lifts the sixth pup up from its sprawl on his lap. "He's a talker." Eddie's eyebrows raise, impressed. Most of Sakumo's dogs do not talk, so a new talking summon is very welcome to Eddie, seeing as he can't communicate with the other dogs like Sakumo can.

"Want mum! Want milk!" The little pug squeaks, unimpressed by Eddie's mustached mug.

"I was thinking of naming him Pakkun." Sakumo continues, fondly scratching the puppy under its wrinkled little chin. It makes a happy little 'ooh', and its tail thumps happily.

"Pakkun?" Eddie rolls the name around in his mouth, and decides. "Nah, he's definitely not a Pakkun type. Maybe Bob, or Larry." To the pug dog; "Yeah, you're a Larry, aren't you?"

"Larry!" The puppy says enthusiastically, "Larry! Me Larry!" Sakumo glares at Eddie.

"Yeah. Totally a Larry." Eddie says with satisfaction, his work done.

"Thanks a lot." Sakumo sighs.

* * *

I'm feeling ambitious. Can we get two reviews this time?


	16. Consequence

I do not own Naruto, nor Watchmen.

Hey! Happy Thanksgiving everybody! I haven't written another chapter because school has intervened and I am currently working on a monster research paper. Nevertheless, here's the next chapter!

Two more chapter to go until Part Two begins. I'm thinking about moving this fic from the Watchmen section to the Crossover section, as Part Two will focus more on the Naruto world as I view it, and will focus on Rorschach and his team of OCs growing up.

This chapter is the first huge change in the crossover, for both Watchmen and Naruto sides. I hope you like it.

Thirty-seven chapters and counting...

* * *

If he had only done something earlier, none of this would've happened.

But neither Eddie nor Sally ever thought Sakumo would take his own life, not while he still had Kakashi.

After Sakumo's disgrace, his wife Sumire left him to return to Tea Country. Apparently she had only meant to marry a hero, not a rapidly disintegrating screw-up.

On top of that, Kakashi is seven years old, and chuunin already, some kinda prodigy. Laurie is four years older than he is and she hasn't even graduated from the academy yet.

Eddie considers suicide the most selfish thing a man can do to his family. He's always been a selfish person, true, but his family is _his_ and he's selfish enough to want his little girl less fucked up than the rest of the world.

Sakumo's gone. Like that - not bam, dead - but slowly, bled out on the wooden floor ala hara kiri. No one there to decapitate him and make it mercifully short, so he could still die with honor – no, he thought he didn't deserve the luxury.

Never saw it coming. Sally and Eddie tried to hang with him, cheer him up, but they're Leaf-nin too, and the fledgling Third Secret Ninja War takes up as much of their time as any elite Jounin's. Sometimes they don't even have the time to check up briefly with Laurie so she's living with his mother-in-law right now, so what the fuck does that say about them?

Time's run out.

Eddie stands there in the puddle of his friend and teammate's blood, too tired at this hour to be anything but dead inside. Sakumo's empty shell has already been taken away, but beyond that, nobody's cleaned up further.

Kakashi is ashy-white with shock.

Numbed, Eddie looks at the boy. He's too young to handle this. Legally he's an adult, but fuck that. Part of being a stable ninja is knowing when rules are appropriate, and not. The kid could go live with his Jounin-sensei, seventeen-year old squirt by the name of Minato Namikaze, who's been making those noises that he might take him in, yeah.

But.

Minato's never been a father and Eddie has. He knows what it takes for a kid to turn out okay. After the mess with his own father, he should have grown into a drunken, smoking, womanizing bastard, but he didn't. It took Jiraiya to keep him laughing, and Shido-sensei's firm but mildly affectionate hand to teach him he wasn't destined to repeat the pattern of abuse Eddie's grandfather probably beat into his own father.

Namikaze may be Kakashi's teacher, but Eddie is his goddamn godfather. (And doesn't it make him regret naming Jiraiya as Laurie's rather than Sakumo?)

He makes up his mind.

Sally will understand.

"C'mon, kid. You're living with me now."

* * *

One chapter, please? Spread the cheer!


	17. The Man Who Would Be Hokage

Well, holy crap. I'm writing the fortieth chapter as we speak. I've never gotten this far before, and it's a hell of an ego-booster, as are your wonderful reviews.

More changes!

I do not own Naruto, nor Watchmen.

Thirty-nine chapters and counting.

* * *

Orochimaru panted as he ran. That last clash with Jiraiya had cut things a little too close in his escape from Konoha. He was bleeding and burnt in several places, and he was positive that he'd cracked at least two ribs, more possibly bruised. It hurt to breathe.

He was so focused on breathing and maintaining his breakneck pace through the trees that the attack, when it comes, takes him completely by surprise. Sloppy of him, the greatest of the Sannin, but even he can only take so much. Someday, he will be able to handle everything, even fighting off death, but not yet, not now.

The fireball takes his hair and most of the tree he's jumping towards with it. Something crunches as he lands on the root-tangled forest floor, hard. A hard kick to the torso breaks those cracked ribs Jiraiya gave him. Blood in his mouth. He's scrabbling on the ground, trying to get up, but he hurts, it's excruciating. His chakra reserves are gone, exhaustion is setting in along with shock. His left arm is not moving properly, and tingles, evidence of nerve damage. He looks up, and the Comedian sneers back at him. Blake has all the handseals done by the time Orochimaru struggles to his feet, trying to escape.

A full body tackles takes him down to the ground again. Flaming hands wrap around his throat, a stocky body also on fire bears him to the ground. The only thing he can do is not scream in pain, can't even get the breath for that. Of course the Comedian would have an offensive jutsu that lights his own body on fire.

"I let you go earlier, y'know, Snake-boy." Blake says, the flames surrounding him not bothering him at all, "Jiraiya had first right to your head, 'cuz you're teammates and all. Guess he was too decent to go all the way." He shrugs, and the flames move with it. The smell of slowly cooking skin fills the space between them. "S'alright. Sometimes it takes a monster to kill a monster."

Orochimaru wants to argue, no, Blake isn't a monster, and if he is, he's a tame one. He flails, gets some damage in, but the Comedian ignores the pain and takes it, ignoring it. The flames continue to burn agony through every body part that comes into contact with the bigger man, cooking deeper and deeper as time goes on. He extends his arms and legs out, stretched limbs striking weakly.

Blake's hands squeeze tighter around his neck, his eyes shining in delight, and, with his slowing pulse pounding in his ears, Orochimaru begins to understand.

For every time Orochimaru has given into his desires, Blake has tempered his own wildness with his goals, and suppressed them, only letting them out in battle, in appropriate times.

"Wanted to do this for twenty-five years, Orochimaru." The Comedian smiles, as the pale-skinned Sannin's vision begins to grey around the edges. "So I waited, and whaddya know, got my chance..."

Blake says something else, but Orochimaru's hearing has faded out, and soon, so goes conciousness too.

******

Eddie waits for five minutes after Orochimaru's heart stops beating, hands still locked tight around that pale neck. Finally he lets go, flexing his stiff hands, and then sits up to brush the ash off his clothing.

Out comes the short sword, and off goes Orochimaru's head. Eddie pulls out a small scroll, a bottle of ink, and a brush.

He unrolls the scroll and gets to work.

Sealing has never been his forte, unlike Jiraiya, but he understands the usefulness of making your own explosive and shock tags, and especially storage scrolls. Being best friends with a master of sealing had its benefits, and it didn't take much convincing to get Jiraiya to teach Eddie the basics of sealing.

Before long, Orochimaru's body was sealed away, the blood on the springy forest floor and the remains of the splintered tree burned with a quick fire jutsu, and Hidden Leaf's Comedian was gone as well, speeding back to Konoha, chuckling to himself.

* * *

Just to clarify, Eddie is not as strong as Orochimaru, not in a straight fight. But then again, the Comedian doesn't play fair, does he?

A review would be greatly appreciated.


	18. Kicking and Screaming

Well, wow. Part one is over!

As part two deals more with the Naruto side of things, this story will be moved to the crossover section.

This will be the last regular update. I'm currently working on an original book series, but fear not. Chapter forty is finished, and if i haven't gotten any more of this story done, there is a guaranteed update Christmas day. Enjoy!

I don't own Naruto, nor Watchmen.

* * *

Tsunade is shocked when she tells her apprentice she's leaving Hidden Leaf for good, and Shizune refuses to follow.

'I can't."

"Why? You said you'd follow me anywhere, once." Her student flushes.

"I'm sorry, Tsunade-sensei, but I can't. I'm in a.. a..."

"What? You have a boyfriend?"

Shizune squirms.

"No, not a boyfriend."

"Why, then?" Her dark-haired pupil goes a brighter red, but her voice is steady when she replies.

"I have a girlfriend. Ursula and I are going to live together. Tsunade-sensei, you know how it feels, like with Uncle Dan-" Tsunade glowers at her but she keeps going, like if she says it fast Tsunade won't take it poorly. "-We're thinking about getting married." The Legendary Sucker blinks slowly.

"Very well. You can stay." It's a dismissal, and Shizune nods, bows, and leaves to find her lover.

*******

Jiraiya doesn't take the news of her imminent departure well.

He all but begs her to stays, tells her what she's known all along.

He loves her, wants to heal her, will even stop pursuing her romantically if she only stays.

In the face of his devotion, she scoffs.

She's never taken him seriously. She isn't going to start now.

*******

Sarutobi-sensei, after much badgering, gives in and allows Tsunade to leave the village.

*******

She's so tired of this place, of her life. Just wants to curl up and die quietly, but the proud, dying fire within her will not settle for that.

Life is nothing but a greyed road stretching ahead, no color left.

She wants out.

And maybe, if they hate her, they won't miss her.

It never occurs to her to ask for help.

*******

She's standing before the massive gates of Hidden Leaf, gear packed and ready to go.

Tsunade hesitates. Once she's through those gates, she might never return. It's a big step to take. She tries not to think of the betrayed look on her only teammate's face, the utter resignation on her teacher's.

She's made it to the trees when she stops, sensing a presence.

A meaty hand settles on her shoulder.

"Who the fuck said you could leave?" She tries to shrug the hand off but it only tightens.

"The Third did, as did the Fourth Hokage." She snaps.

"Doubt they really meant it. They just fell for your guilt trip, Boobs, that's all." Edward Blake sneers, leaning towards her. She tenses. She really hates that nickname, but doesn't crush him for his crudity. All these years she's underestimated him, never thought he had it in him, just a screw-up like Jiraiya.

But no, she'd been wrong. He was the one bringing Orochimaru's body back to Hidden Leaf, dead. She'd like to believe he hadn't killed the traitor, but the body had the Comedian's killing style written all over it. Never thought he had it in him.

"This village has taken everything from me! My brother, my lover, my grandfather and his brother after him! How dare you ridicule my loss, what gives you the right--"

He slaps her, hard.

"Grow up, you immature bitch. You're thirty-five years old, and Dan and your brother have been dead for eleven fucking years, so get over it."

"You know nothing of my pain, you shit!" She screams.

"You think I don't know pain." He chuckles, as if this is funny somehow. "What a joke. I thought _I_ was the Comedian here." The so-called Comedian grabs her by a pigtail and reels her in. She'd love to let fly a punch, but the Fourth had been deadly serious when he told her any move against a Leaf-nin would constitute as an act of war, and he would not hesitate to take her down.

"My civilian mother was killed by enemy-nin for just being the Comedian's mother. I lost three brothers and a sister to the Second Secret Ninja War. My pop drunk himself to death, and he treated us all like trash, and you think I don't know pain?" He laughs, shaking his head slowly. "It was a relief for him to kick the bucket! My wife has had to fuck strangers to get information out of them.

"Sally and I had three children together, and two of them died in their cradles. We only have Laurie now, and sometimes this village keeps me so fucking busy that I only see her once a week at best.

"My teammate screws up a mission, and the whole village turns on him. When he couldn't handle the hatred thrown at him, he killed himself.

"You think I don't know pain? Grow up and get over yourself. Life is pain. No one said it was going to be easy. When people die, their pain is over. Dying is a relief. So don't have a tantrum because your life didn't turn out the way you wanted. You're lucky – except for being a sucker, you got it good – looks, smarts, skills, power, money, influence. You could have family and friends, easy, if you actually tried for once. And it ain't enough?

"Didja really think it'd be that easy to leave Hidden Leaf? A ninja's oath is more binding than marriage, your duty is never over, not until you die. You are a tool, and when a tool isn't being used?" He leans closer, right in her face. "It's useless."

Chakra flares from above. Tsunade's gaze darts up to see the form of her once-best friend, Sally (nee Jupiter) Blake. The kunoichi in the trademark yellow dress finishes a long line of handseals.

"That speech take long enough?" The man asks his wife, who grins.

"Perfect timing." Sally praises.

"Boobs, just so you know," Eddie shares with a sigh, "I meant every word of it. We're gonna get you the help you richly deserve. 'Bout time you saw a doctor yourself."

And then Tsunade finds out why the Blakes are considered the deadliest married couple in the ninja world.

Eddie's fist breaks her jaw.

The genjutsu Sally hits her with shortly thereafter puts her in a coma for two weeks.

*******

When she wakes up, there's a long line of shrinks and interrogation specialists ready to break her down and build her back up into the Sannin she used to be.

Major depression, they say, is what leached the color from her life. Nawaki's death shook her, Dan's was too much to handle and the stress triggered an onset of severe melancholia.

There is therapy, and medication.

Jiraiya, once a thorn in her side, is at her side every step of the long journey back to sanity. He's quickly becoming her closest friend.

When she's feeling more like herself – and she hasn't been herself for years, apparently – Sally comes by to apologize. Tsunade forgives her, if a little warily. They probably saved her life, or at least sent her careening down the path of recovery.

"I just have one question-" She says, "Was Eddie telling the truth?"

"Yes." Sally Blake replies. "Every word."

* * *

As I minor in Psychology, I like to give characters mental disorders, because sometimes it explains their behavior easily. I have an intimate knowledge of depression, and it seemed to fit with Tsunade's early behavior.

And that's the end of part one!

Part two will focus on Rorschach growing up.

Part Three will focus on Dan as he teams up with Rorschach.

Part Four will deal with Naruto and his generation. This is where the changes will become obvious.

Reviews are greatly appreciated.


	19. Part Two: Of Imaginary Friends

I do not own Naruto, nor Watchmen.

This could fit in a non-crossover Watchmen story, but it sets the scene for part two fairly well.

* * *

Walter Kovacs is three when he learns to feed himself. Mommy forgets sometimes, because she's busy making noises in the locked bedroom with all those grumpy grownup men.

He waits until his stomach hurts, until it gurgles in his belly like the water does in the rusting pipes in the walls. Then he leaves his room and shuffles down the hallway past the locked bedroom, past the men waiting their turn on the hall bench, to the cramped kitchen with the stained floral wallpaper. He tries not to look at the men, never makes eye contact, Mommy said she'd hit him with the belt if he stared. He is expressly forbidden to talk to them, even if they talk to him first. She never tells him what the punishment for talking would be, but if she can't even say it, then it must be far worse than the belt or a slap could ever be.

In the kitchen he pushes a chair against the counter, and stands on it to get to the pantry. He pulls out the plastic cereal bowl he keeps under his bed for the express purpose of filling with the cereal or crackers he can find in open boxes in the cupboard. Then he puts the full bowl down, pushes the chair back to the table, and goes back to his room with the bowl. He closes the door and eats his find, freckled legs swinging over the edge of his bed, pretending he doesn't hear the noises down the hall.

Walter stays in his bedroom, which is just big enough for his cot, a dresser with four small drawers, and a tiny window so caked with grime that even the brightest sunlight barely shines through to his dim, dank space. It's the one place in the apartment he considers safe. He keeps his toys under his bed so there's room for the door to swing. There's not much, but he keeps it tidy. He likes everything to be clean and neat, as so little is in his life.

There's a story behind every toy. The five faded wooden blocks were given to him by the next door neighbor in the tenement building, once they realized there'd been a little ghost-like boy living next door for over two years. The piece of string he'd found in the closet. The sad remains of a popped balloon Mommy gave him for his third birthday, the only birthday present he's ever gotten, and it had been bright, and floaty then. A stick he brought back from the park, just the right size to be a pretend sword. A collection of soda caps from the trash. A dirty tennis ball.

The threadbare stuffed cat that has a place of honor on his cot is not a toy at all. It's his very best and only friend. Her name is Pushy, and she plays with him and his toys. She likes to knock down his blocks, and chase the string, and bat the bottle caps around, and pounce on the ball. She talks to him and tells him things no one else does, like he is a good boy, and nice, and that tomorrow he will make friends with very nice girls and boys and that's okay, as long as Pushy stays his very best friend, or that maybe Mommy will be happy when she sees him.

She cuddles him when he goes to sleep, and comforts him when he's sad. Pushy loves him, and he thinks his Mommy loves him, maybe, when she's happy and not drunk.

This delusion does not last long.

******

One day Pushy gets so worn, her head falls off. Mommy throws Pushy's dead body into the dumpster outside the building, so Walter can't pull the stuffed cat out of the trashcan again and try to revive her.

Walter cries himself to sleep for a week.

* * *

Poor baby Walter...

No ninja anything yeet, but soon!

Reviews are greatly appreciated.


	20. Dreams of the Father

I do not own Naruto, nor Watchmen.

Been working on my Zelda fic lately. But there will be a guaranteed update on Christmas and once a month if I don't write anymore new chapters. I do have forty-one chapters written already...

Enjoy!

* * *

Walter has a dream he keeps secret, secret from anybody.

His father's name is Charlie, no last name. Charlie is short for Charles, which is weird, because they both have the same number of letters.

His father is not around, probably because his mother is a whore, and not a nice one either. But if his father knew about him, he'd definitely take Walter away. So his father doesn't know, or maybe he did, but is dead. He must have been a samurai, serving the Fire Lord, and died in the war.

There are a lot of samurai in the Capital City of the Fire Country, and even some ninja, but samurai are better than ninja because they don't sneak around and lie.

Maybe his father didn't die in battle, maybe someone made him look disgraceful and have to commit _hara kiri_ to keep his honor and not compromise his values.

Walter wants to be a samurai, and fight for honor and his liege lord. You don't have to be good with people or good-looking to be a good samurai, so Walter thinks he'd do okay.

On the street when he passes samurai, Walter wants to talk to them, and ask if they maybe know his father. But he's not worthy enough to talk to them, just a scrawny whoreson, so he doesn't do anything, just stands there, _watching_, and dreams the dreams of a boy who has nothing else.

* * *

Very short chapter.

One review, please?


	21. Discovery

I own neither Naruto, nor Watchmen.

Here's the Christmas update! Because I've been riding hard and heavy on writing my Zelda fic, updates will come either once every month, or every time a new chapter is written, whichever comes first.

Enjoy!

* * *

All he wants to do is get to the store and come home, preferably unmolested. There are two or three local bullies in the neighborhood all maybe five or seven years older than him. He's learned to be faster than the other victims.

But the two men that melt out of the alley have not been boys in a long time.

"Hey you!" Walter does not make eye contact, just walks faster and hopes to get away.

"Yeah, I'm talking to you!" The two speed up, and a fat hand drags him to the mouth of the alley. "I'm not done talking to you boy. Even a whoreson needs to use his manners." He looks up, into sneering faces he saw two weeks ago, the worst memory in eight years of an unhappy life.

They push him around, the mocking insults lost to the pound of blood in his ears. Think they can take what they want, just like that afternoon when his mother handcuffed him to the bed and let them do whatever they wanted, just so she could make the rent.

He's not handcuffed now, he realizes, as they pull at his clothing.

The man has a cigarette burning in his mouth. A perfectly round burn scar on his forearm once taught Walter that cigarettes are for more than just smoking.

He will remember what happens next as mostly a blur, one man's scream, launching himself at the other, flesh under his teeth, and blood welling up, a second voice screaming.

Screams fill his ears until leather-clad hands wrestle him away

"Shit, man, lookit him--" A deep woman's voice exclaims.

"Like an animal, not some civilian kid!" Man's voice this time. He is drawn into arms dressed in mesh and pulled up against a canvas-armored chest.

"Good for him, Kosuke, you know what those pissants were doing."

Walter looks up and sees a Hidden Leaf insignia wrapped around the foreheads of the couple taking him away from Walter's would-be molesters.

He stills, wary.

_Ninja._

Gloved hands set him down on the sidewalk, brush him off, turn his chin this way and that.

"God, he looks just like Charlie, Keiko." Kosuke says, squinting. "Hair, face – except for that nose – even his eyes."

"God, if this is true, Linda is going to be _pissed_. It's a good thing he's dead – if he did - can't believe he'd ever cheat."

"My dad's name is Charlie." Walter mumbles, and the ninja both swear in unison. "But he's not here."

"Charlie? Like Charlie DeWitt?" The woman asks sharply.

"I don't know!" He yells, angry suddenly, because he's not stupid, and all those fantasies he's grown up on are broken. "He's called Charlie, and he was a samurai who got killed in the war! Not a sneaky, lying ninja!" Pity hangs in their eyes, and Keiko shakes her head.

"Kid, Charlie DeWitt was the greatest ninja of his generation. _Not a samurai_."

"Kid, what's your name?"

"Walter."

"Walter, I want you to take me to your mother, please."

"But I have to go to the store-" The kunoichi presses a finger to his lips.

"You can go to the store later. Take us to your mother. Now."

He leads, reluctantly. The adults argue a little on the trip back, but Keiko silences Kosuke with a firm,

"I am not depriving Hidden Leaf of another DeWitt, however illegitimate. Not with the way things are going lately."

So he obeys, and when they get back, the way his mother's face goes white at the sight of the pair of ninja is more eloquent and damning than words could ever be.

He is sent to his room while the grownups talk, and he buries his face in his almost flattened pillow, curling up in the bed. He's scared, because those two want him for something, and for Walter Kovacs, someone desiring his presence never turns out for the better.

In the end, the decision is made.

Walter is going to Konoha to be a ninja.

He wishes his mother weren't coming too.

* * *

A review, please?


	22. Moving In

I own neither Naruto nor Watchmen.

It's been a while since I posted. No more chapters have been written past 40.

This is the part where we truly start to worldbuild.

Enjoy.

* * *

When Walter and his mother get to Konoha, they move into a small apartment in Flicker District; one of the poorer districts in Konoha. All seven districts within the city are named for fire; Blaze, Flicker, Hearth, Ember, Ash, Sizzle, and Flare.

It's practically on top of the fish market, which is the reason why the rent is so low. There are two cramped bedrooms, a bathroom, and a single living room slash kitchenette. It's run-down, but the building is sturdy enough. The windows are dirty, one is cracked, all of them are jammed shut, and the carpet peels up against the mustard-yellow wall.

There is no heating or air-conditioning. It smells musty and humid and definitely has a hint of fish, but it's far better than the old tenement apartment's accumulated reek of certain bodily fluids. There isn't much hot water, but the old tenement back in the capital sometimes didn't have water at all, let alone heated water. The apartment heats up fast in the sweltering sub-tropical climate, faster than they're used to. The capital is further north and further inland than where Konoha is located, and thus has a temperate climate, and milder summers.

The heat puts his mother into a bad mood, so Walter wisely stays out of her way. He wanders the village, taking in the sights, habitually prying change out of gutters and pocketing it. He drinks in this place that wants him, thinks he's worth enough to move him all the way from the capital.

It's beautiful here. The buildings are whitewashed, with patched red tile roofs, pipes clinging to the architecture like steel vines.

The people are friendly; they smile at the eight-year old as he passes. Walter finds enough change to buy lunch, and the man who runs the tempura bar pats him on the head and calls him 'kiddo'.

Birds fly overhead, messenger pigeons, nin-hawks and sturdy blackbirds with long tails, and the strangest cry – it starts out low and rises high, a sort of _tuu-weeek!_

And the _trees_. Massive trees on the horizon, dark and lush like a primeval forest, in which monstrous beasts must surely lurk, creatures of wonder and horror.

There are trees within the city limits too, sometimes even a feature of the architecture – houses built around or on the trees. There are viridian parks with lush grass and bright playground equipment, where children pretend to be fearsome ninja.

The air here is different from the capital, fresh and invigorating, with a flavor of smoke from the controlled brush fires Leaf-nin use to burn open the seed pods of the behemoth trees, thus prolonging the collective life of the rainforest.

The streets are paved with brick, with deep gutters. They're clean, although that might be from the local daily downpour. It pours down - _buckets_ of it - for half an hour, almost exactly at two in the afternoon every day. The streets turn into creeks, the drains gurgle, drinking rainwater greedily. Afterwards, the hot, sucking summer sun dries the puddles within hours. The locals take their lunch when it rains, wisely evading the downpour.

To the south looms the Hokage Mountain, with the proud heads of the village leaders carved into it, vigilant and still. Walter wants to be like them, noble and dignified, wants faces to turn to him with the same reverence. They are not handsome men. They didn't need to be.

He finds the civilian library nearest his apartment, and fills out the paperwork for a card with the help of a librarian. He checks out books about ninja, and civilian fighting styles, then goes back for a dictionary after paging through the books a little.

He fills his head with words like _duty, honor_, _cunning, gile, _and _deception_.

School is coming up, fall will begin in a month, and so will the Konoha Ninja Academy. Walter will never be as ready as the other children – he is civilian, and foreign. He knows very little about what being a ninja actually entails. But he can learn, he can try.

Ninja have to be smart, so he reads whatever he can find and understand.

Ninja have to be strong, so he trains his body. Runs in the mornings and afternoons, pushups and sit-ups, punching the air and turning his whole arm as he strikes like the karate book told him to, twisting into it with his whole body.

Preparation is his watchword.

And all this preparation takes him away from the apartment and his mother, which can only be good.

* * *

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	23. Family Ties

I own neither Naruto nor Watchmen. But I do own the DeWitts.

Linda DeWitt is a bitch. Yeah.

* * *

"Whatcha doin'?"

Walter blinks, and looks down at the little girl talking to him. She has a fistful of his pants leg and is pulling at it, hard. She's maybe four, and has red hair that curls around her shoulders, the same shade and curl his hair has. She has chubby round cheeks.

"Practicing." He says, "Who are you?" She giggles, as if this is funny.

"I'm Emmy Scarlet DeWitt, 'a course! _Everyone_ knows that!" Her pale blue eyes peer at him curiously, a frown briefly curving her cupid's bow of a mouth. "Howcome you don't know that?"

Walter frowns back.

"I just moved here."

"Really? Welcome to Konoha, I guess!" She lets go of his pants leg, and spins around a few times before stopping to look at him again. Her light blue dress swirls around her legs. It matches her eyes exactly. It matches Walter's eyes too. "What's your name? Do you like it here? I think Konoha is way better than other places!"

"I'm Walter. Kovacs. And um, yeah, I think Konoha is nice."

"Now you're talking, you talk funny! You got a- a accent! You was practicing, like my big brother Jacob! He's a ninja, you know. Kara's starting to practice too, and she's bigger than you. She's going to ninja school soon. When I'm big I'm going to be a ninja too! My Daddy was a ninja, but he died and I'm sad 'bout that but I'm going to be just as good as he was. And I'll wear one 'a those headbands!"

Overwhelmed by the speech coming out of the tiny girl, Walter has a thought. A horrible thought.

"Was your dad's name Charlie?" She shuts her mouth, staring, all vivacity and ruffles.

"Wow!" She exclaims, "How'd you know? Everyone in Konoha knows, 'cause he's famous!"

Walter says nothing. Silence is safer than words.

"Well?" She prompts.

"My dad's name is Charlie, too." He says reluctantly.

"Really? You look a little like my Daddy! I'm gonna tell my mom!"

"No."

"Yes! You stay right here, an' I'll be back!" Emmy heads off, out of the shade provided by the park trees, then wades through the crowd of children at the playground.

She runs to a brunette woman in a pale green dress the color of apples, and grabs her hand. As Emmy drags her mother over, the woman's free hand comes up and smoothes Emmy's curls and smiles.

In that moment, the woman who must surely be Mrs. DeWitt is radiant. She is pretty, round cheeks and a heart-shaped face like Emmy's, only more finely boned. She looks like everything a mother should be.

She looks nothing like Walter's mother.

Walter looks at her, and of course his father would choose her, this lovely, kind creature, over his pug-nosed, fat swearing whore of a mother.

In that moment he knows he is nothing more than a mistake, one left uncorrected until it was nine months too late. He knows this suddenly, like he knows the sky is blue.

Emmy finishes pulling her mother over, and drops her hand to point at Walter.

"This is Wally-Walter, mom!" She says, bouncing a little. "Doesn't he look just like Daddy?"

Linda DeWitt stares at Walter like she's seeing a ghost. The healthy color drains from her shapely face.

"Emmy," She says slowly, and even her voice is beautiful, "You should stay away this boy. He isn't nice."

"Yes he is!" Emmy pouts, "He's way nicer than Jacob ever is!"

"No Emmy." Mrs. DeWitt takes her child by the hand. "He's a bad boy-"

"No!" The redheaded girl whines, pulling on her mother's hand,

"-Yes! He is! And I don't want to see you talking to him again. Ever again." She looks him right in the eye, spine straight and proud.

"Don't you dare come near my daughter again you filth." Walter's mouth goes dry. He cannot help but stare, numb. "We're leaving."

Mrs. DeWitt picks up Emmy and leaves.

Leaving Walter behind.

Now he understands why ninja must kill their emotions.

* * *

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	24. Lists upon lists

I'm not very happy with this chapter, but it won't get any better - just filler, really. Next update is tomorrow, this is that bad.

* * *

Ninja Academy is not quite what he expected.

Yes, there is role call for attendance, a short speech welcoming the new students to class and a promise to turn them all into fine shinobi, beginner's instruction for martial arts, which Nelson Gardner-sensei calls 'taijutsu,' and rules for ninja to follow. Just as expected are the descending rows of desks and students alternately eager or bored.

What Walter did not expect was a long list of equipment and books to buy for class.

Figures, really.

******

Blunt kunai and shuriken.

Books, such as

_From Mercenary to Militant Masters_

_The Sixfold Path_

_The Art of Jutsu_

_Standard Ninja Protocol – Hidden Leaf Edition IV_

Fitted canvas armor

Three rolls of blunt-edge wire

Basic toe-less sandals

Academy-grade survival gear and pack

And so on.

******

…It's going to be expensive

He goes to his mother with the list – she scoffs at the expenses. She has been using the money afforded to them by the Konoha Widow/Orphan's Fund for her own pleasure. What does not go to rent and groceries goes to cigarettes and booze, or glamour magazines.

He should not have to point out that technically the money goes to Walter, who is Charlie DeWitt's son, not Sylvia Kovacs – who is nothing like a widow.

He points it out.

There are a lot of things he shouldn't have to do, but no one has ever told him this.

He is in Konoha for a reason. He does not point out that Konoha wants nothing of a common whore. His mother is just there for the ride.

She knows this.

He knows she does.

In the end, she gives in, with a dismissive "phf!", as if he's not even worth a curse. She hands him more money than he's ever held in his life, and kicks him out of the apartment with a "Don't come back 'til you have all that shit, you hear?"

In the end, it's just barely not enough. He buys the cheapest variations on the list. It is long past sunset when he finishes with buying everything – he's 910 yen short, but the girl running the cash register lets him have the sandals at a lower price out of pity.

Walter runs across Emmy DeWitt the next morning on his way to the Academy. She waves at him and he ducks his head, and so does not see the cold look on Mrs. DeWitt's face.


	25. First Friend

I own neither Naruto nor Watchmen

I'm much happier with this chapter. Just a little character fleshing out.

* * *

It's lunchtime when footsteps approach quiet, serious, stand-offish Walter Kovacs. He's eating a chicken and cheese sandwich he made and packed this morning.

"Hey, um. Walter?" The voice is shy.

"Hmn?" Walter wonders, and his fellow classmate twitches a fraction. Who is this? Dark spiked hair, green eyes, skinny but taller. Yeah – Katsura Hideki. Ninja family. Weak stance in Forms, good at paperwork. Wears too much mesh and not enough clothes, indecent, not good for protection.

"So, uh, I've been having trouble with taijutsu, and you're really good at it. Could you help me out? And how did you break Jiro's nose with just one punch cuzitwasawesome!" Katsura finishes breathlessly.

Walter shrugs the compliment off.

"I hit hard. And aim well." Katsura flushes in embarrassment. "You need to deepen your stance, that's why you get knocked over so often."

"Thanks, man." The brunette sighs, "Is there anything you need help on? Make this a fair exchange?"

He considers this, frowning. He's one of the better students, good all around. Not the best – he has no ninja parents to help, no money to buy more books and decent equipment, no bloodline to provide a free advantage. But good, balanced.

"Need help with mission report protocol, field interrogation records." He offers, though he doesn't really need the help.

But Katsura brightens.

"Dude, I know all about interrogation! So, uh…" That helpless blush again. "Wanna be friends?" He offers his hand. "You do the fighting, I do the torture?"

Walter's never had a friend before. His long-gone stuffed cat never counted, not really. Back in the capital no one wanted to be friends with a quiet, awkward whoreson. He's tried his best to take advantage of his second chance here in Konoha, but poor social skills are not easily improved, regardless of effort.

It does not help that Kara DeWitt is his age, and quickly gaining in popularity. She spews to anyone who will listen the second-hand hate of Walter Kovacs she receives from her mother, effectively and ruthlessly darkening Walter's already dim hopes of rewarding companionship and firm personal alliances.

"Hm. Deal."

It's the beginning of a beautiful, tentative, if brief, friendship.

Walter will guide and mentor Katsura through the rough parts of the Academy, while the taller boy will hang out and generally tolerate Walter's social faux pas. It's a good deal.

Three years later Katsura will cut all ties with Walter in the hopes of earning a place in Kara's heart. He will tell her all he knows about the quiet boy, and Walter will get his first glimpse of betrayal.

He will feel guilty but vindicated when Katsura Hideki, fair weather friend, flunks out of the academy at the next exams.

* * *

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	26. Money, money, money

I own neither Naruto nor Watchmen.

Does anyone want to read my notes on my view of Konoha? It has maps and a detailed explanation of what is located in each district. It can be found in my liveournal here: http:// rinrabble . livejournal . com / 1526 . html (Just remove the spaces and you're set.)

* * *

Somewhere in between learning to set the fuse on an explosive tag and perfecting his chakra control, Walter picks up a hobby.

His mother's hands have always been shaky. Her alcohol, nicotine, and caffeine fixes alternately dulls down or increases the tremors, but never near enough to thread a needle – whereas Walter's hands are 'steady as a rock', according to a joyful Nelson-sensei, when the class learned lock picking.

The repair work on their clothes has always fallen to Walter, even before they came to Konoha. He started small. Little things, like reattaching a button that fell victim to one of Mrs. Kovacs' overenthusiastic clients, or mending a rip. Over the years Walter has learned to keep his stitches neat and small, how to hem something in for length, match colors exactly, or find a thread color complementary to the clothing if there is no exactly matching thread. He's learned about seams, and the flow and fit of a garment.

He doesn't usually talk to the neighbors, but when he sees Tanaka-san grousing over the rip in his shirt on the outside steps of the apartment, he can't help himself.

"I can fix that, sir." Walter says, gulping a little when Tanaka's dark gaze turns towards him. "If you want."

"Can you?" The neighbor wonders, a little sheepishly, and the academy student's fear melts away.

"Yessir." Walter hurries to get his sewing kit, and in ten minutes the shirt is repaired. The older ninja grins.

"Thanks a lot, kid." Tanaka fishes a few yen notes out of his hip pouch and presses them into the boy's hand, with an enthusiastic "I'll remember that skill of yours next time."

Walter doesn't count the money until he's safe in his room with the door closed. It's enough for one book at the store, maybe two if he picks through the bargain books.

Library books are all well and good, but as an academy student he has no clearance at all on the restricted stuff, even Genin level. If he wants to do well he needs an edge beyond being a jack-of-all-trades. Most students have allowances or parents to give them that edge. Walter does not. Book stores are the solution – the restrictions are far more lax when money is being moved around.

He hides his earnings under a loose floorboard until he has the time to shop.

When he goes back for the money, it's still there.

At _Tatsuki's Books_ Walter finds a book on information gathering – it covers deception, surveillance, acting, and espionage. Most of his classmates focus on taijutsu and flashy ninjutsu, forgetting that ninja evolved out of spies. Walter doesn't. If he is to serve the Hidden Leaf, he will serve it well, and pay attention to every detail, see behind every facade, leave no path unexplored.

He paws through the bargain bin in the civilian section and finds a slim bound book titled _Tailoring for Beginners_. It's better than the books in the library, and comes with tissue-paper patterns for basic garments such as shirts, pants, jackets, and so on.

It's a wonderful feeling, buying something for himself with money he earned honestly.

Two weeks later Tanaka comes to him with damaged pants, and two more shirts. Walter works on them when he's not doing his homework or practicing at the nearest empty training ground. Again he is paid, and again the money goes under the floorboard.

Every few weeks Tanaka drops off something, and soon other tenants in the building are giving him work to do as well. As the money accumulates, Walter worries about his mother finding his stash.

During his weekly trip to the library, he asks Henna Kujikoto at the reference desk about what to do.

Walter has been a regular patron at the Konoha Flicker District ninja library ever since he entered the academy, and the librarian-nin there know him well. He's quiet and so serious, never trouble and they are all too aware of his home life. He likes them too, because they are useful and knowledgeable, and they are always willing to help. Walter considers them firm allies, battling ignorance with one heavy reference book at a time.

Henna smiles and suggests a bank account for when he becomes genin, but he won't be able to have an account of his own until then. Any earlier and he needs a guardian to sign for him. And therein lies his problem.

"Tell you what, Walter," Henna says, "Minna – who works the circulation desk - her husband works in financial services. Maybe he can pull a few strings and get someone accountable to sign as your guardian. Are there any teachers at school you trust?"

"I trust Nelson Gardner-sensei – from the Ninja Academy." Henna writes the name down.

"Nelson Gardner. O-kay. Why don't you ask him, and I'll get Minna to look into this?"

"Thank you." Walter says gratefully, and Henna just smiles.

"Anything for my favorite redheaded student. Here, have a Sugar Leaf." She hands him a piece of rock candy popular in Konoha, green, unflavored, and shaped like a birch leaf. Walter takes it with a faint smile, unwrapping the Sugar Leaf and popping it into his mouth. "By the way, that book of myths you wanted is in now, but Flare District has our copy of _Meddling with Magic; the Rise of Bloodlines_ on loan still, so you might have to wait a week or more until it comes back…"

Walter listens to Henna natter on as he sucks on his candy, and when she's done, crunches the treat down, checks out the book he requested and heads for his favored training ground just between the outer borders of low-rent residential Flicker District and Sizzle District, which is named thus for housing most of Konoha's restaurants and bars.

A week later he returns to the Flicker District Library to check on the status of his requested book, do his homework, and talk with Henna, who lets him know that substituting his teacher for a guardian is a go, and gives him another wrapped Sugar Leaf.

Nelson-sensei himself seemed pleased to help, so all that's left is the paperwork, which the adults have told Walter he need not do much except sign his name. He doesn't understand why, thinks it's best to learn how to deal with these matters as he does everything else – on his own, taking care of himself.

Finally, a little security in his life. Walter has a bank account of his own, to keep his duly earned money safe and away from his mother.

Exams are due to start in three weeks. Walter might graduate and make genin in a year after that. Nelson-sensei and Henna have helped him come up with a plan to leave the apartment he shares with his mother, and start making a living on his own. He'll get the allowance from Konoha's Widows and Orphans Fund. His mother is no widow. It's Walter who will get the money, and Walter who will spend it, and spend it wisely, once he is free.

For once, the future is looking a bit brighter.

* * *

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	27. School Project

So I heard you want Dan. In my plan, Dan actually didn't show up until chapter 50 or so. But I wrote this chapter just for everyone who wanted some Dan. Apologies Walter is not good with people yet.

I own neither Naruto nor Watchmen. I own Emmy DeWitt.

* * *

Six months to the final academy exam, Nelson-sensei announces that the class is going to start a month-long project that will teach the fourth-year students how to lead a team of subordinates.

Each fourth-year student is to lead a team of two first-years, children fresh-faced and only just starting to realize what life as a ninja was like and what it required from every citizen of Konoha. Only fifty percent of the original class will make it to their final year, let alone graduate. Therefore there are two first-years for every pre-graduate.

The project seems simple – help the younger students with their schoolwork and develop camaraderie with them over the next five weeks. Both the fourth years and their underlings are given an hour of class every day to interact. And every Friday the group of three goes through a group test – graded on how well the fourth-years lead, and how well the first-years obey orders. And horror upon horrors, at the end of the month, the fourth-years are to take their charges on a three-day survival test.

He'll do fine, Walter thinks. Two snot-nosed children to tell what to do. One month, and he'll never have to see them again. Show off just enough to make them in awe of him – newbies are like that – and they'll be pliable enough. They don't have to like him. Why would they, anyway – few children anywhere close to his age ever do like him, after all.

Walter hopes they are slightly skilled – or this is going to be a nightmare.

He has no idea.

*******

As he surveys his charges, Walter decides Nelson-sensei belongs to the Devil.

Because he's assigned him one Emmy DeWitt, and a plump boy by the name of Daniel Dreiberg.

Emmy, who still speaks in exclamation marks, pretends they have not met before, and they therefore manage to avoid awkwardness. Her introduction was chipper, her handshake crushingly tight.

Dreiberg has either had a very bad day, or is an insufferable prat.

"Dan Dreiberg," He says, pudgy hand outthrust, a scowl on his face. "I'm not related to the Akimichis in any way, kapeesh?" Walter blinks, for once out-scowled, but shakes the boy's hand firmly.

"Is obvious, Daniel. No facial tattoos. All Akimichi have them." Emmy snickers, blue eyes bright.

"Oh." Daniel looks miserable. "Don't… Don't call me Daniel. Only my dad does that." His father – use the authority figure, Walter thinks, he doesn't have to like you, just obey you.

"Yes, Daniel." The redhead says carefully and tolerantly, ready to analyze the reaction.

The eight-year old refuses to talk to him for the rest of the hour.

That could've gone better.

******

Nelson-sensei could not have given him two more different subordinates.

Emmy is a lovely flower of competence, ninja-raised and born. Walter knows she'll graduate, make something out of herself.

Daniel he is not so sure of.

The boy is a conundrum, at once puppyish and desperately eager to please, and simultaneously crabby and disheartened. He is clumsy. He is chubby and slow. He is very smart and has very good aim. And his civilian banker father does not want him to be a ninja. He is so, so innocent. Walter does not think he has ever been as naïve as Daniel is.

And he does obey Walter after Emmy takes him aside and talks him into submission.

She has a way of doing that, saying strange things as if they are completely reasonable and convincing everyone else that what she says is, in fact, reasonable. Emmy is a strange creature – there is plenty of evidence to support this, also. After all, she seems to adore Walter, despite her mother's hatred of him.

And she speaks in exclamation marks, which makes her cute and perky in a way that makes Walter's brain melt under the realization that she is his half-sister but is absolutely nothing like him.

The group of three manages to scrape a pass in the first weekly test – which makes Daniel miserable, because he is clearly the one slowing his partners down.

"Maybe… maybe I'm no good at this. Maybe I should just quit." He says forlornly, brown eyes miserable behind coke-bottle glasses. Walter reaches over and pinches the younger boy until tears come to his eyes.

"Don't you dare, Daniel." He says, glaring. "Ninja don't quit. Want to be worthy of name? Never surrender. Never give up. Hard work, hard life. Is worth it." Running out of ideas for his scolding, he adds desperately "Quit and I will tie you up. Will never be found. Then what?"

Dan looks terrified, and leaves early. Emmy, who has an older brother, doesn't seem to find anything unusual with Walter's behavior, but then, she is Emmy Scarlett DeWitt – the exception to everything. Walter is a little worried he's scared Daniel off for good, but he doesn't think long on it. He's managed to pull a muscle in his calf during training one day, which makes walking agony. Furthermore, the apartment he shares with his mother has developed an infestation of cockroaches. The filthy little buggers crawl on him in the night, making sleep all but impossible. Sore, and almost catatonic with fatigue, he has far more immediate worries than an awkward first-year struggling with a career choice.

So he's surprised when Dan awkwardly thanks him on Monday, for his support. He shrugs it off, and helps Daniel with his fighting forms. Perhaps one day Daniel will no longer fall on his behind every time he attempts horse stance, but it doesn't seem to be happening soon.

After that first week, Dan tries a little harder, stops giving up so soon.

They make it through the month okay, not stellar, but they pass the next three Friday tests within a comfortable margin. Daniel is over the moon.

The survival test is all right. They don't actually leave Konoha's walls. They are simply assigned a training ground in the woods to camp out in.

Daniel turns out to recognize every bird in the forest simply by its song. He also turns out to be a dab hand at finding good firewood and starting campfires.

Nights are kept from being awkward – Emmy is terrified of the dark, which requires both boys to sleep on either side of her to keep her safe from whatever demons her mind conjures in the night. Walter hopes she grows out of that fear – it will only impede her.

When the three days are over, they return to the school, pleased to find they've passed the project, and part ways.

If they were closer in age, Walter might consider Daniel a friend. But Daniel is eight and Walter is eleven – the three years are insurmountable.

Three years will not seem so far, nine years later. But that is in the future.

* * *

Yay for Dan.

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	28. Meeting People

One of my favorite chapters.

I own neither Naruto nor Watchmen. I own my original characters.

* * *

This is it.

Walter sits eagerly in his seat at the Academy for the last time, spine ramrod straight. To the untrained eye he is blank and bored, or would think that, if they ignored his usually steady hands trembling in excitement.

He takes a deep breath through the cloud of nervousness, cataloguing familiar scents. Wooden desks, dust, paper and ink, machine oil, chalk and steel. Adrenaline. Soap. The lucky graduates, his fellow classmates are extra clean today of all days, trying to make a good impression on their new teammates.

He too is prepared for the future – a new uniform he's labored over for the past month, fitted but loose shirt and pants, fabric an inky black with narrow purple pinstripes that had been on clearance at the cloth store. He has a whole bolt of it left over (for repairs and a spare set, just in case). It is boxed up with the rest of his belongings from the apartment he shared with his mother, waiting now in his new apartment, located in the opposite side of Flicker District. The view is terrible, and the neighborhood is bad, but there are a few good eateries nearby with nutritious, tasty food, and the apartment has far more space than the apartment he's leaving behind. It's the end of his unfortunate experience of family. Today they will part ways, whether they may meet again lies in the hands of fate, but Walter hopes not. Without the widow and orphan's allowace, or means of employ, his mother is likely to return to the capital. Prostitution is not legal in Konoha, and such laws are rigidly enforced.

He huffs, and tugs on the long leather vest he is wearing, decorated with easy to reach pockets. This too is new, brown leather sturdy under his gloved touch. It will serve as armor in a pinch. The gloves are purple, to match the uniform's pinstripes.

Nelson Gardner-sensei clears his voice loudly, and the buzz of excited chatter tones down.

"Fellow shinobi," He begins, smiling fondly. Someone gives a whoop in the back row. "Welcome to the start of your life as a ninja. You have learned well, and it is an honor to see you out into the wide world. I may no longer be your teacher, but I will always be ready to help you, and should you ask for help, help will be given. Serve your village well, with honor, duty, courage, cunning and guile. Thank you." The class breaks into applause directed either at themselves or their teacher.

"You will be placed on a team with two of your classmates under a Jounin teacher. Learn from your teacher, and from your new teammates." Nelson-sensei smiles, and pulls a list off his desk.

"I will now announce the team rosters.

"Team One: Kara DeWitt, Klika Kadiri, and Ken Riki under Bill Brady.

"Team Two: Genji Minaka, Yutaro Shiite, and Hisoka Takada under Byron Lewis…" One by one, Walter's classmates file out to meet their new teams.

"Team Three…"

"Team Four: Hiko Hyuuga, Michiyo Kagami, and Walter Kovacs under Reika Gintaki."

Walter stands, chair screeching across the wooden floor in protest. He and his new teammates descend the stairs, leaving the room.

Out in the hall a very short, curvy woman, silver-haired, waits for them. She is perhaps a head taller than Walter.

"Team Four?" She queries, pale eyes sharp and slanted, lined with kohl to resemble a cat's.

"Yes, sensei." The girl in their team replies. Their teacher nods, a sharp jerk of the head, long braid bobbing with the movement.

"Follow me, then."

*******

The Jounin leads them over the rooftops, from Hearth District and through Flicker District.

As they move, Walter takes the time to examine his new team.

Hiko Hyuuga, tall and long featured, impatient white eyes and black hair in a ponytail. Multiple piercings on both ears - unusual in a clan so typically aristocratic. Good at taijutsu, from what he remembers from school. Intelligent, perhaps above average talent.

Michiyo Kagami, another clan name. His height. Choppy, short dark hair and bright eyes, narrow nose and wide mouth. She notices his gaze and dimples at him without baring her teeth in a smile. It's a disconcerting thing to behold. Fairly balanced, smooth taijutsu, decent scores in genjutsu, sloppy handseals.

Their new sensei stops in a training ground deep in the woods. A wide but shallow creek runs through the middle of the shady clearing.

The silver-haired woman hops up onto one of the training posts that litter the grounds and perches there.

"C'mon, sit down." She prods, and the three Genin obey. "Thank you. Right! Let's begin with introductions. Name, favorite color, life's goal, your biggest strength, biggest weakness, a hobby, and an embarrassing fact." The short-haired girl snickers on the ground next to the Hyuuga, covering it up with her hand.

"I'll start. My name is Reika Gintaki. My favorite color is purple. I want to have a long life, and maybe a husband eventually. Biggest strength? Information gathering. I am not a dog person. I paint. As for embarrassing secrets, well, my best friend is a cat. Right, that's me done. You! In the smashing purple suit!" Reika-sensei points straight at Walter. "You next."

"Walter. Kovacs. Black and white." He says, nervousness increasing the scarcity of his words.

"Full sentences please, Walter." Reika-sensei prompts.

"Ennk. My goal is to serve the Hidden Leaf. My biggest strength is willpower. Weakness is lack of resources. I like to read. Hkkh. …I sew my own clothes."

"Thank you, Walter. Hyuuga now." Hiko scoffs.

"It's _Hiko_ Hyuuga, sensei. Blue is my favorite color. I wish to become a master of seals. My greatest strength is precise chakra control and taijutsu. My weakness is… hn, lack of stamina. I enjoy mathematical puzzles and crosswords. An _embarrassing fact_," Hiko says the words with great distaste, "I am homosexual."

_Homosexual. First day of adulthood and already forced to work with deviants. Is it possible that there are such people in a dignified and strict clan like the Hyuugas?_

The brunette girl snorts.

"What, so you mean us girls didn't have to worry about you usin' those eyes of yours to peek into the lady's changing room _after all_?"

"Yes, thank you, I do believe it is _your_ turn to talk now." Reika-sensei says pointedly.

"Alrighty then. I'm Michiyo Kagami. Green is the most patriotic color in Konoha, and my favorite. My goal is not to end up just another Kagami Bride, perfect wife and baby machine." Her long nose wrinkles. "I'm not squeamish, good with ninjutsu, too."

_Hm. Information gathered about her not correct, or she overestimates herself. Something to look into further. _

"My seal work is a mess. I love to cook and sing. Um. Embarrassing secret? I talk in my sleep."

"Something we'll all be sure to exploit, Michiyo." Reika-sensei says cheerfully. "And cure you of, once we have gathered enough blackmail material." Next to Walter Hiko snickers and smirks. Michiyo sticks her tongue at him, and then at Walter, even though his face has remained politely blank.

"That is, if you three make Genin."

_What?_

"What? You thought just needed to pass the final exam in the academy to make Genin? You thought wrong. Oh, c'mon, don't glare at me like that. Of thirty-six students in level four of the Konoha Ninja Academy, twenty-seven passed the exit exam, and were then funneled into nine groups of three. In peaceful times only the top three teams would be allowed to remain intact. The teams who didn't pass muster would then be trained further and employed in jobs such as D and C rank clearance administration and the like. Genin in Jounin-led squads are kept on a fast-promotion track, and usually make Chuunin and even Jounin sometimes. In more hostile times, like now, four or five teams are allowed to continue."

"So how--"

"--does this team stay intact?" Reika interrupts with a predatory grin. "By passing yet another test. My test." She uncrosses her legs and slides off the wooden post to her dainty sandaled feet, beginning to pace. "So here's the test. In one week, I want you to investigate a fellow ninja, and gather as much information about them as possible. Walter, I want you to cover Hiko. Hiko – cover Michiyo. Michiyo – find out about Walter. Record your findings, and deliver it to me in Classified Profile RS-2E format. Also, record the seven days I have given you in a detailed mission report format – one standard of an undercover mission, class… B, I think. You are allowed to look up those forms if you don't recall it from school, though you _should_ know them after four levels of Academy. Bring both reports here – this is Training Ground 16. I will review both reports, and compare them to what _I'll_ have found out about you three munchkins next week. If the two are close enough for my tastes, I'll put in a petition to keep this team intact. One good enough that the Hokage will immediately pass Team Four.

"To give you further incentive, I'll even tell you why I am testing you this way and not using a standard bell test. Team work is obvious. You have already learned to work with others in group projects assigned by your teachers. Your ninjutsu, taijutsu, and genjutsu abilities meet the Academy's standards or surpass them. What I want to know is whether you can use both your brain and what you've learned from the Academy.

"I want to see if you can be a ninja, pure and simple. Not a warrior, not a martyr, not a goddamn superhero. Ninja. A spy.

"I can teach you a lot of things, but I can't teach you the mindset of a spy. So go. We will meet here in seven days, at noon. Do you understand what I want from you?" She stopped pacing, hands on her hips.

"Yes, sensei." They mumbled, grudgingly. She rolled her eyes.

"Louder!"

"Yes, sensei!" The three chorused in unison.

"Good. _Dis_missed!"

* * *

I've had Michiyo, Reika, and Hiko. None of them are mary-sues. They're just experiments in distinctive personalities and speech-patterns.

Yes, and reviews still warm the cockles of my cold, cold heart.


	29. Observations

I own neither Naruto nor Watchmen.

I adore Michiyo. She's a hoot to write.

* * *

"You want to know about the Hyuuga clan? You're lucky you have D-class clearance for that, now." Henna says from behind the Flicker District Library's reference desk. "Otherwise you'd learn nothing more than rumors."

Walter grunts his thanks.

"Always glad to help." Henna says, waving it off. "Now that you actually have clearance, you can access the D-class archive. Just walk up to the second floor, press your dominant hand to the section of the back wall painted with the large leaf motif, and channel your chakra into it. The birch sapling pattern is C-class, the oak is for B-class, and the sequoia is for A-class. Only the Hearth District Library Branch has an S-class archive, and only because it's located in the Hokage's Tower. Anyway, each pattern is a sealed door, and the seal applied should recognize your chakra signature, and let you in if you have a high enough clearance."

"Got it." Walter says.

"Okay, great. Just sate my curiosity, please?" Walter cocks his head at her, questioning. "Why do you need to learn about the Hyuuga?"

The genin considers. Missions are supposed to be kept secret. But then, if the quarry himself knows he is a target, is it really that secret? His sensei never explicitly said to keep it secret...

He decides.

"Assignment from Jounin-sensei. Get to know members of team." Henna looks nonplussed.

"Okay, then. Good luck searching." Walter nods, and takes his usual piece of candy from the glass bowl Henna leaves out for patrons of the library, then heads for the stairs.

*******

The trip to the library is successful. Walter learns of how the Hyuuga clan is split into two branches; the smaller but dominant Main Family, and the seal-trapped Branch Family. He thinks the seal is a smart idea, but feels it should probably be used on the whole clan so the Hyuuga's prized eyes cannot be stolen. Perhaps it should be applied to the Uchiha clan as well. He finds the pain-inducing part of the seal sloppy and vulgar. Did the Main Family want to incur the hate of the majority of the Branch Family? Angering a group far larger than yours was not wise thinking.

For as long as Hiko has been in the academy, he has worn a bandana over his forehead. Now the Leaf-embossed forehead protector covers his forehead. In all likelihood, Hiko is a member of the Branch Family.

Walter has learned a lot about the Hyuuga family, but not much about Hiko as an individual.

******

He utilizes Nelson-sensei next. The blonde teacher seems flattered by the attention of one of his graduates so soon after the exit exam.

"Walter! Good to see you. What brings you to my office so soon?"

"Need to know more about my teammates."

"You've come to the right person, son. The Academy has not finalized the school reports of this year's graduates or sent copies of them into the archives. You can't find that information anywhere but here, not yet, at least. So who do you need to find out about... hm... Hiko or Michiyo, right?" Walter nods.

"Hiko, please." Nelson-sensei goes through the pile of folders and frowns.

"I'm not done yet with his file, but young Miss Kagami's is done. Tell you what, come back here tomorrow and I'll have an extra copy of both of your teammates waiting for you. Would that work, or are you on a tighter deadline than that?"

"Have five days to go. It can wait, sensei." Walter pauses. "Appreciate your help with this."

"Always glad to help, I'm always glad to help. Have a good day, Walter."

The genin bobs his head, and leaves his former teacher to his work.

_Good kid,_ Nelly thinks. _Smart, always eager to learn. Polite too. He'll go far._

*******

Day five of Walter's mission arrives.

He is concealed in the shrubs outside the Branch Family's part of the Hyuuga clan's compound, with binoculars and a notebook handy.

"Boo." Michiyo says, squatting down right next to him. Walter jumps.

She didn't startle him – no, he heard her approach long ago. He's just uncomfortable with her proximity. From what he's read of her file, she has a tendency to treat others very familiarly, regardless of their level of comfort with this trait. Which is why she's got one hand on his shoulder, using him to lean over and peer through the gap in the bushes, her other hand holding the binoculars she's taken from his hands up to her eyes.

"Don'tcha think he knows you're here, spying on him?" She wonders aloud, "He can _see through walls._" She makes a _tsk_ noise with her tongue. "Nice stances, fast handwork. Yeah, he knows. Just glared right at me. Aw, he just tossed his hair at me. Very foofy. Yeah, buddy, I'm still lookin' at you. Wow, he's really going at that training dummy. He looks pissed."

"There a reason you're here?" Walter growls, taking his binoculars back.

"Yup." Michiyo replies, crossing her arms. "Wanna come over for dinner tomorrow night? My place at six. My mom wants to meet y'all." Walter blinks, then protests.

"Why? Not really a team yet, still have final test to pass."

"Well… I talked to some people who know about you, and Nelly-sensei's mouth ain't exactly sealed shut – he practically offered to tell me everything – but I've found out all I can about you without actual interaction with you." She says reasonably, "You're a very private person, and it's not like Reika-sensei told us we couldn't interact with our targets. So I thought, well heck, why not? Hiko's coming already, with his parents – I'm letting him come right into my house – he'd be stupid not to take up my offer. That's why he's busy training instead of spying on me. Didn't you wonder why he wasn't? If you come you can meet his folks, see him all polite and having to answer all the questions we ask 'im. You can come alone – my mom and dad think you're an orphan. From what I read of your file, I thought you wouldn't want your mom to come."

"Thought right." Walter grates out. The girl pats him on the back familiarly, and he flinches.

"So whatcha say? You coming or do I gotta drag you?"

"Wouldn't our sensei consider this cheating?"

"Can't break a rule you don't know about. My dad says good ninja know when to break the rules."

"Why are you doing this – not in mission parameters."

"Because it's us against her!" She exclaims in frustration, "Because all three of us have to pass for any of us to win. So I'm going to make sure we pass. You _will_ spill personal information tomorrow night or I'll know why."

"You consider this a team effort then."

"Yeah, you don't miss nothing, then, do ya." Michiyo sticks out her hand. "Friends?"

Walter takes it gravely.

"Truce."

They shake solemnly. Michiyo's grip is firm and strong.

* * *

(Does the review please! dance.)


	30. Dinner and Secrets

So it's been ever so long since I last posted. To be honest, I have abandoned this story in favor of my epic Zelda story. Apologies. I will be posting the remaining chapters one for each week, and then follow with my plot notes, so you will get what would have happened, in a summary. This fic was more an exercise in writing than anything else, and I thank you all for humoring me.

I only own Reika, Michiyo, and Hiko. Naruto is not mine.

* * *

One and a half days until mission complete.

Walter stands on the front step of a neat, tidy house in Ash District.

Despite being located in the center of the village, this district is the quietest in the village, from what he's seen of it, perhaps because it contains most of the cemeteries and the massive Memorial Wall upon which the names of Konoha's martyrs are engraved. There are not many tall buildings, nor many businesses, just somber cemetery plots, wide expanses of parkland, training grounds and neat rows of houses. This house follows the architecture of most of Ash District. Konoha in general follows a trend of whitewashed walls and red tile or corrugated metal roofs, but Ash District breaks from the norm. Here houses are wooden, boarded sides painted muted colors of blue, yellow, green, rich earthy reds and even lavender. The roofs are slanted slate shingles.

Michiyo's house is grey-blue, with white trim. It sits quietly behind a sharp green square of lawn, shrubs trimmed into submission beneath wide windows that spill golden light into the night outside.

The Kagami household is small. The clan itself is large, but made mostly of women, who live in their husbands' house, leaving only the Kagami men and their families. Wisely, Walter thinks, they let the patriarch of the family tend the massive Kagami manor, whilst the sons tend to their smaller households.

Michiyo told him to dress smart, so here he is, skin and hair scrubbed raw, wearing the best clothes he owns - a mostly white button down shirt and his uniform pants, black with purple pinstripes.

He tries to pull his head together. He must be polite, and respectful, and use complete sentences as best he can. He must also observe Hiko and gather as much information as possible during dinner, whilst dealing with multiple questioners, all perfect strangers. When he is ready, he raises his hand to knock firmly on the bright green front door.

It swings inward, opened by a woman who looks a little like Michiyo. Her hair is dull brown to Michiyo's glossy black, but the eyes are the same. The smile is not. Walter does not know his teammate well at all, but she does not bare her teeth like that.

"You must be Walter," She smiles, and Walter wonders what Michiyo knows about him, and what she has told her parents. He never wanted to tell his mother much of anything when they lived together, and no love lost between them, and so does not understand the mechanics of healthy, normal family relationships.

"Yes ma'am." He murmurs in response.

"Come in. I'm Hanako Kagami, Michiyo's mother."

"Nice. To meet you." She smiles again.

"You're right on time, everyone's already in the dining room. This way." She leads him to a cheery room with mirrors hung up on the wall like one might hang paintings or photographs. The dining table is a large oval, and it and the corresponding furniture are made of a rich, dark mahogany. The walls are painted a lush navy.

Mrs. Kagami points Walter to the empty seat before sitting down herself.

Next to Walter is Michiyo, her hair slicked with some kind of vulgar product so it frames her face rather than falling into square layers around her ears. She turns her head to look at him and the movement of her head makes Walter realize she is wearing some kind of make up.

"Hey, Walter." She says, with a small, rueful smile, using her napkin to surreptitiously wipe off her lipstick. "You look… dressed up. Can't believe Mom's making me dress like this."

Walter just shrugs at her.

"Got yourself into it, things don't go as planned." He mutters, examining the people seated around the rectangular dining table.

Next to Michiyo is a tall man with the same black hair as Michiyo, and dark, almost mirror-like eyes. Then, further back, a pouting older girl similarly tarted up like Michiyo, with the same hair and eyes as Mr. Kagami, possibly a sister. Then Mrs. Kagami, who he has already met.

A scowling Hiko sits next to her, hair braided into a plait and ears free of jewelry. The woman sitting next to Hiko is obviously his mother, and obviously a Hyuuga. Both mother and son are wearing crisp white informal kimonos. Next to these finely dressed families Walter feels more than a little shabby.

"Walter, let me introduce you to everybody." Michiyo says those words like she's heard them before; obviously she has been trained to be a good host. "Everyone? This is Walter Kovacs, one of my teammates. To my right is my father, Taro Kagami - my older sister Mikoto - my mother, Hanako Kagami – I have a younger brother, Shin, but he's at a friend's house - Hiko, obviously – and his mom, Hotaru Hyuuga." A loud beep sounds from the direction of the kitchen.

"Excuse me," Mrs. Kagami says, rising, "I'll go bring out dinner."

"Where is your father, Hiko?" Walter wonders, once the woman is gone, and Hiko's scowl deepens into a full-on glare. Hotaru Hyuuga coughs a little.

"Hiko's father and I divorced, about three years ago." She says quietly. "And you? Where are your parents, Walter?"

"Live on my own."

"Hn," Hiko says, blank white eyes sharp, "I just noticed. Your accent is foreign, but still from Fire Country. Where did you pick that up?"

"Came from Capital City. I moved here when I was eight."

"I would understand that if your parents were ninja with posts in the capital, but I distinctly recall someone saying you entered the academy a civilian, not shinobi-born." Hiko says wickedly.

"Don't be a dick, Hiko." Michiyo says sharply, likely knowing what Hiko wants to hear.

"No. It's fine like this. Teammates deserve truth." Walter said, twitching a shoulder up in a half-shrug. "I'm the illegitimate child of Charles DeWitt. His teammates found me, brought me here. Apparently I look like him."

"You do. Only with sharper angles. Thank you for being truthful." Hiko says, "I take no pleasure in cruelty, but I wanted balance. In your introduction you revealed no real truths, no vulnerability, no trust."

"Trust must be earned." Walter mutters.

"So says the person who stalked me for a week."

"Yes, well. Reika-sensei kind of wrecked the normal trusting bit of teamwork right at the start." Michiyo says, her mouth quirking.

"Hn. You are correct." Hiko smirks. He scratches his neck. "…Are either of you adverse to comparing notes?"

"I don't have a problem with it." Michiyo says, grinning that closed-lip smile of hers.

"…Even if it is cheating?" The Hyuuga wonders slyly.

"Can't break a rule you don't know about." Walter grunts. Michiyo grins at the two boys.

"My words exactly. Y'know, you two ain't too bad."

"Are we supposed to know what you're talking about?" Michiyo's father wonders. She pats his shoulder playfully.

"I'll tell you later."

"Dinner's ready," Mrs. Kagami announces, carrying a heavy platter. "I hope everyone likes grilled chicken and zucchini?"

The smell is delicious, and the entire table announces their approval.

All that's left to do is dig in, and keep a sharp ear on the conversation.

* * *

i like reviews.


	31. Reports Reviewed

Hey everyone. I will be posting weekly my leftover chapters I hadn't posted, and am currently writing up a summary of what I had planned to write but didn't have the time to write in detail. I know it's not as good as the real deal, but at least you won't be left hanging, right?

For any of you who are also following Child of the Sun, I will return to that epic when I settle things with this story. Expect more updates in two or three weeks at most.

I own neither Watchmen nor Naruto. Hiko, Michiyo, and Reika-sensei are my own.

* * *

She arrives with a flash of silver and purple, running, no flashy teleportation jutsu like they've heard all the Jounin use to impress.

"Afternoon, kiddos!" Reika Gintaki chirps, skidding to a halt in front of her prospective students. "Time to turn in your reports, and then you're dismissed. A little anticlimactic, yes, but I've got a lot of reading to do. So cough them up." The trio exchanges a few silent looks before handing Walter their copies. He shuffles them into a neat pile, and stands to hand over the sheaf of surveillance and mission reports to the Jounin.

"Thank you~!" Reika-sensei carols, taking the papers and tucking them under her arm. "Congratulations, you've just completed the equivalent of a C-class Intel mission. You will not receive any payment like you would if this were a real mission. We will meet again to discuss the results of your test at eleven sharp tomorrow morning. Same place. See you then." She shoots the three probationary Genin a thumb's up before dashing out of the clearing.

"She is in a hurry." Hiko remarks slowly.

"Maybe she's got a hot date." Michiyo says, shrugging.

"Or a television show to watch." Hiko counters.

Walter shakes his head.

"Wrong. Both of you." He points out, "Why waste time on students who haven't passed yet?"

Michiyo sighs.

"…You're probably right. Damn."

* * *

"Nice to see you all again, and on time too." Reika-sensei says a day later, waving from her seat on a training post as the rest of Team Four arrives via canopy to take their places at her feet. "I'm not going to beat around the bush. You've passed."

Michiyo punches the air with a hissed "Yessss!"

Walter allows himself a tiny, twitchy smile.

Hiko simply smirks.

"Yes, yes, well done. Now - for the debriefing." Reika-sensei says with a smile, leaning forward and crossing her legs at the knee. "Hiko; excellent use of your eyes, but did you think of using your chakra to enhance your hearing? Your Byakugan works quite well for visual surveillance, and spying on archived information. This method of investigation is excellent for discovering daily movements, hobbies, habits, and general recent behavior. However, this method relies too much on actions rather than semantics. You can't tell what has happened in the past. Try not to rely too heavily on your eyes, useful resource that they are. At some point you may have to gather information whilst undercover, and bulging veins around your disguise's eyes are a big giveaway. Your wording in the report was precise and professional. There are a few gaps in logic, but as this is your first time, I'll let it slide.

"Walter; you used an effective combination of surveillance and using your contacts and resources. Using the Ninja Library was good, the civilian libraries don't have much of anything useful ninja-wise. However, with the low-rank clearance you get as a fresh Genin, you won't find much. Going to a trusted source of information like an academy teacher was a wise decision, particularly with the reason you provided to your contact for why you required the info. The fact that you tested the accuracy of the information you received was not something I would expect out of a fresh Academy graduate. The only problem I can find is that Hiko spotted you spying on him, but then, he is a Hyuuga. Your reasoning and logic is very clear in your report, and you were very thorough in going about the mission. Your report was the most accurate match to my own information, and you will be rewarded for that. I could, however, have done without the long paragraph about sexual orientations and the sins thereof."

"Understood." Walter grunts, rather pleased with Hiko's look of dismay, and Michiyo's brief but sudden coughing fit as she fights laughter.

"I'm glad." Reika-sensei says drily. "Now - Michiyo; you are without a doubt the best people person in Team Four. You did the same as Walter in going to your old teacher for information, but you took it further by interviewing Walter's old and new neighbors, fellow classmates, heck, even random passers-by. Better - you managed to convince your target to verify and expand your information of his own will, through persuasion and incentive. Best of all, you realized that I asked you all not to spy, or keep anything undercover – all I asked was _to gather information_. As for the information swap you goaded Hiko and Walter into doing, I will recognize it for what your intention was – to make sure the entire team passed, and not to just be the best on the team. Your report however, linguistically, was the worst."

Here Michiyo makes a face.

"Your handwriting and grammar are atrocious. I will attempt to improve those while I am your teacher, for the sake of the poor admin-nin working in the Hokage's tower. There are multiple holes in your logic, and I don't think you accounted for all of your time during the last seven days. Despite this, the info swap was highly insightful.

"Overall, I'm impressed with you guys. There is endless room for improvement, but I think you've got what it takes to read between the lines, and keep a clear head on the front. Whew!" She grins, fanning a hand at her face as if to cool her off, "What a speech, huh?"

"Highly informative." Walter says, tilting his head just a bit. Their new teacher grins at them.

"Well, good then. This is my first time as a Jounin-sensei, so I want to do this right. You'd better live up to my expectations or there'll be hell to pay!" Reika-sensei snickers. "Got a few ideas on how to train you guys. Nothing too crazy. I'll use what worked for my sensei, Fire preserve his will, and what I think will work. I just don't know how much time I'll have with you." She straightens, her face turning serious. "I'll be straight with you. The situation with Hidden Rock is going to get worse. Much worse. I don't know if it'll be big enough to be the next Secret Ninja War, though. In anticipation of this, I have permission from the Hokage to not go on any missions out of Hidden Leaf for the next six months. This is a good thing!" Reika-sensei says with a quelling glare at her students' dismayed faces. "This means you won't be getting into a kill-or-be-killed situation, not until you're ready to handle that.

"Every minute of your day will be accounted for and put to use. Every hour you spend will have a purpose. Here's the plan: seven hours of sleep a night, one hour for general reading, and an hour for travel time. Lunch will be eaten with the team. Dinner is family time.

"We meet here, in Training Ground 16, every day at sunrise or six, whichever comes first. You will spend fourteen hours a day with me, completing a mission a day. When we are not doing missions, we will be training - in taijutsu, ninjutsu, genjutsu, teamwork, information gathering, acting skills, and so on. I expect you to learn at least a little of every field. We'll start out with basics, at least knowing what the fields are and what they're for.

"I know the Academy taught you some of this, but the Academy material is as dry as bone. There is a point to everything I teach you. We will spend several hours studying the specialties you are interested in. Anything I can't teach you I will find others to teach you what you want to learn. That's what I have so far. So!" The silver-haired Jounin claps her hands together.

"Today's Monday. We meet at the appointed time here on Wednesday. You have Tuesday off. Enjoy it, because you won't have free time for a _very_ _long_ time. Any questions?"

"Nope." Michiyo says, and the boys add their agreements.

"Great! Who wants lunch?"

"Me!"

"I do."

"Hurm. Yes."

* * *

I hope you're enjoying my OCs. I enjoy writing them, and they all exist for a purpose.

Please, please review.


	32. Team Firsts!

I own neither Watchmen nor Naruto. Anyway, this is an experiment in characterization, dialogue, and writing in present-tense.

* * *

Wednesday comes.

At sunrise, Reika-sensei leads Team Four in five brisk laps of the village, saving the long upward slope on the border of Flare District for the end of each lap. The Genin finish the last uphill climb sweaty and breathless. Walter's limbs want to shake but he does not let them.

A silver eyebrow raises as she surveys her panting students.

"Get used to it as fast as you can." She advises. "We're building stamina at both ends of the day. As soon as you can make this run easily, we'll add weights to the equation. You get ten minutes for water and rest, and then it's three on one sparring, capture-the-flag style. D-Rank mission distribution begins at eight-thirty, so we've got two hours to spare. The three of you are going to try to get the bandana, which will be tied around my arm, thusly." She pulls a lilac cloth out of her hip pouch, securing it to her arm. "This is to evaluate your combat skills both as an individual and as a team."

After ten minutes, Walter's breath comes easier, the stitch in his side more subdued. His fellow teammates look a little worse for the wear. Hiko's pale face has lost its unhealthy, almost-purple flush.

_He really _does_ have poor stamina after all_, Walter thinks.

"Come on, get up!" Reika-sensei chides, spreading her feet into an easy stance. "You've got an hour and a half to take the flag from me, and then its mission time." The trio stands up straight, muscles tense and coiled, waiting. "Ready? On my mark… GO!"

* * *

Walter has seen the mission room in the Hokage's Tower before, on a field trip in the first year of Academy. But he's never been here to take a mission. The room is well-ventilated; fans blowing the moist heat of late spring away, bringing with it the distinct smell of cedar, ink and paper.

Team Four gets in line behind a battered Jounin in black. Walter tries not to stare at the man – who is missing an ear.

As the line moves, Michiyo is favoring her right leg, from when Reika-sensei kicked her during their bout of capture-the-flag sparring. Hiko pops his neck with a sinewy crack and sighs in relief. At one point the Hyuuga was swept onto the ground, landing full on his back, winding him. Walter fared better than the other two, but nonetheless, he can feel the bruises forming under his clothes, spreading purple and black like the colors on his uniform.

The line moves quickly, and it takes little time to reach the mission desk.

"You took your time deciding on your team, Reika." The Third Hokage smiles, all wrinkles and tanned leathery skin. He looks like a battered but well-loved glove, Walter thinks. "Was the decision worth the wait?"

"It's worth taking the time to make the right choice for an important decision, my Lord." Reika-sensei smiles back.

"And how is your boyfriend, that student of mine, doing? I have not heard from him recently." Their sensei frowns in confusion.

"Boyfriend? Oh, you must mean Jiraiya. Ah, he's doing fine, teaching that speed-nut student of his – what was it? Arashi… no, Minato. Minato Namikaze." She shrugs. "We're just fooling around. I expect we'll break up as soon as Tsunade-hime makes up her mind about him."

Walter's not sure what to think of that, that his teacher might be a loose woman. So far she has shown nothing more than competency, intelligence, and a far better understanding of how to teach than most Academy teachers. Even Jounin are not perfect, apparently.

"Very well then. Here for your first mission Walter?" Walter blinks. Is the Hokage on a first name basis with all of his ninja?

Apparently not, as the Third goes on to acknowledge his teammates.

"Miss Kagami, young Hyuuga. Hm… I have one D-rank here, to retrieve the Daimyo's wife's cat."

"Oh _that_," Reika-sensei dismisses with an airy wave of her hand, "That isn't _work_."

"Some might disagree with you." The man chuckles.

"I meant no offense. We'll take it, my Lord. Take a nice, easy mission for our first day."

"In that case, I shall hand this over to you, and good luck on your team's first mission." Reika-sensei takes the mission scroll with a bow, then turns to her students.

"Let's go." Obediently, they follow her out. She walks briskly down the narrow hall. The trio of Genin squeeze into a single file line to allow others room to walk. "Let's head to the roof."

The sunlight glares down at them when they leave the dim interior of the building for the heat-soaked terracotta tiles.

"Take a seat." They obey. "Alright, speech time again. Pay attention, please."

Michiyo giggles.

"Each mission has seven parts. First, we receive the mission from the mission desk. This is Mission Assignment. Then, before every mission, it is important to plan it out. This is called Mission Briefing. After we plan things out, we do it. This is Mission Execution. And once we complete the mission, we discuss what happened, and how it did or did not go as planned. This is Mission Debriefing. Then, finally, we write our report, turn them in to the mission desk to complete our mission, and receive our pay. These are Mission Report, Completion, and Compensation.

"So, we've been assigned our mission. Team Four is to find, and retrieve the cat belonging to the Fire Lord's wife. This is as standard a retrieval mission as there is. There are three parts to a simple retrieval. One, locate the target. Two, obtain and secure the target. And last, transport said target from its current location to the determined location written in the mission scroll.

"Now. First of all, who knows what cats are like?"

"Used to have one." Walter grunts.

"Hiko, Michiyo? You know anything about cats?"

"No."

"Not really, sensei."

"Well, that's two of us at least. You'll need to watch out for biting, and more importantly, scratching. Cats are not like dogs – they don't like being told what to do, and they won't accept a leash. So now, we decide how to go about filling this mission. Let's begin at the end, where we've found the cat. How do we transport an unhappy cat without getting shredded to pieces? Any ideas?" Hiko's hand rises. "Yes?"

"Trapping it in a box or a basket?"

"Yes, that's good. And how do we get the cat into the transport container? -Michiyo."

"Use food, or a string. Or catnip?"

"Again, a good idea. It would be easiest to trick the cat into getting into the container of it's own will. …You have something to add, Walter?"

Walter nods, a sharp jerk of his head.

"Use genjutsu on cat. A mouse, or trick cat into sleeping."

"That, is a very good idea, Walter. Keep in mind that cats – normal cats, at least – have the approximate intellect of a two-year old. Could you do the genjutsu you just described?"

"Yes."

"Good. That will be your task for this mission." Reika-sensei orders, then turns to Hiko and Michiyo. "Can the two of you track down the target?"

"Of course." Hiko says, but Michiyo bites her lip.

"Hiko can do that way better than me with those darn eyes of his. I'll… get a basket and carry the cat back, 'kay?"

"That will do. I'll rent the short-frequency radios that will help to coordinate the team's efforts."

"We can rent supplies for missions? Really?" Michiyo wonders.

"Yes – radios, cameras, tape recorders, mostly electronics for surveillance missions. You have to be a Chuunin to rent them, though."

"Neat!"

"Well, everyone has a job to fulfill now. Good. Then let's begin. Starting with those supplies… For the basket, we'll stop by my apartment – I have one perfect for this kind of use – Flicker District is near the section of forest where the cat was seen last."

* * *

(Excerpt from transcripts recorded from Konoha Short-wave Radio Frequency Fourty-Two, rented from 8:51 to 12:25, Wednesday, April 29th, Year of the Fruitbat. Shinobi recorded speaking are Jounin Reika Gintaki, and Genin Team Four: Hiko Hyuuga, Michiyo Kagami, and Walter Kovacs.)

Buzz…

Tap.

Tap, tap.

A huff of breath.

[Seen it yet, Blue?]

[The target is thirty yards away, North-east-east from your position, Green.]

[Move quietly.]

[Yeah, yeah, Mr. Monochrome.]

[Codename is 'Black and White', Green.]

[Pft. Whatever. Who thunk up these code names anyways?]

[…You did, Green.]

[Oh. …Yeah.]

[Focus, children, and begin the approach.]

[Thank you, Purple.]

[It's what I'm here for, Blue.]

[Ready yet?]

[Yes.]

[Begin approach now.]

[Monotone-]

['Monochrome', or 'Black and White.'_ Just make up mind_!]

[Well, the shoe fits, an' it's not like you don't talk that way, right?]

[Ye gods…]

[I see the target. We've got the right cat, this time at least.]

[Genjutsu is ready now.]

[Okay, okay, I'm really serious now. Let's do this.]

[Am beginning genjutsu as of three… two… one.]

A crackle.

[…Looks like it was successful, good job Monochrome.]

[Just let it sleep a little, Green, to make sure it's really out cold.]

[…It's definitely out, like KA-POW. Can I go now, Purple?]

[Go ahead, Green.]

['Kay, goin' in now…]

Thump.

Rustle.

[It's in.]

[Target contained. All that's left is transport. Right people, let's head out.]

[Yes, sensei.]

[Radios off, so you don't wear out the battery. The rental department fines you if you come back with an empty battery. And if they do, I won't have the cash to treat Team Four to lunch.]

_[Really?]_

[Yeah, really. Offline, now, kiddos.]

['Kay.]

Click.

Static.

* * *

If you are confused who is speaking during the radio section, it is: Michiyo, Hiko, Walter, Michiyo, Walter, Michiyo, Hiko, Michiyo, Reika-sensei, Hiko, Reika-sensei, Michiyo, Walter, Hiko, Michiyo, Walter, Michiyo, Hiko, Michiyo, Walter, Michiyo, Walter, Michiyo, Hiko, Michiyo, Reika-sensei, Michiyo, Michiyo, Reika-sensei, Walter/Hiko, Reika-sensei, Michiyo, Reika-sensei, Michiyo.

And if you haven't noticed yet - Michiyo is the clown of the group. She is very noisy, but Walter is still the main character!

Please review!


	33. The Cards Never Lie

I own neither Naruto nor Watchmen.

* * *

Three weeks after graduation, Reika-sensei pulls out three cards of what appears to be rice paper.

"This is chakra paper. You know how there are elemental jutsu, like the fire techniques you were taught in the Academy to start fires – each ninja has an element that they will be able to use better than another. We call this a person's element. The elements are fire, wind, lightning, earth, and water. However, just because you are a fire type, for example, you will still be able to use wind or earth attacks, probably not as easily as fire jutsu, though. Chakra paper is used to discover what element you are aligned with. My element, for example is earth. I want all of you to take a piece of paper, and then channel your chakra into it. We'll do this one at a time so we can carefully observe the paper's reaction. The paper will burn for a fire type, split in two for a wind type, crumple for lightning, fall apart for an earth type like me, and become wet for a water type. Everyone have a piece? Good. Walter, you first."

Walter looks at the flimsy paper, and pushes just enough chakra into it for a decent henge.

It dampens, and, when he moves his hand slightly, tears more than splits into two soggy pieces.

"You're a two-type, Walter. They're uncommon but it does happen. Water and wind. Huh. Hiko, your turn."

The piece the long-haired boy holds grows wet, then bursts into flame. Hiko drops it to avoid burning his fingers.

"Water and fire." Reika-sensei shakes her head in disbelief. "Well, the fire type is very… appropriate. In more than one way. Michiyo now?"

"Okay." Michiyo's brow furrows for just a moment. The card crumples up, then dissolves into a soggy mess. Reika-sensei just stares.

"I've heard of two-types before," She says carefully, "But never three on one team. And three water types too. Fortunately, I'm fairly good with water, but not so well with wind, or lightning, though I know two guys who do specialize in those fields and owe me a few favors. But they already have students to teach. Ohhh… this is going to take some work." She puts her hand over her eyes, and sighs. Her hand lowers and she shakes her head as if to shake off her surprise, silver braid sent swinging. "Well! I guess our team will be one of the few to cover all the elements, then."

"So it's like, really rare?" Michiyo asks, uncharacteristically quiet.

"Yeah." Reika-sensei shrugs, seemingly just as quickly over it as she was shocked. "Well, anyway, those are your elemental affinities. I'll go to the library and check out some jutsu for your lightning and wind affinities. Expect to get these from me in a couple of days or so – might as well use that B-rank clearance for once. I know a few fire jutsu, as we do live in the country of Fire, but we'll stick with water types because everybody has a water affinity. Don't worry – I plan on teaching you all a basic jutsu from each element, and I expect you to teach each other jutsu from your element. Of course, I'm not giving you all this for free. You'll have to earn it by making enough progress – be it in stamina, sparring, or mission progress."

"Fair." Walter concedes.

"Now, to earn the first jutsu…" Reika-sensei trails off.

"Yes?" Hiko asks expectantly.

"You guys did alright with tree-climbing. Keep working on that. To earn 'Water style: Cascade Whip', you need to master water-walking."

"Dude, normal people can walk on water? Like that God guy in the ancient religion from like, before the Reckoning, with all the crosses and stuff could?" Michiyo exclaims.

"Michiyo, you're talking nonsense." Hiko grumbles, "I don't know where you come up with these things."

"No, really, Dickweed." She says sharply. "It's where we get Christmas from. He's called Jezuz or something. My clan still follows what's left of it."

"Whatever." The Hyuuga shrugs. Reika-sensei sighs.

"No Michiyo. People can't walk on water like the guy you're talking about." She says wryly. "Ninja can walk on water through the application of chakra. By projecting a precise and steady flow of chakra through your feet, you can walk on water."

"Oh. Well, that sounds cool." Michiyo concedes.

"Will require precise chakra control, Michiyo." Walter says quietly. "Not your forte."

"Egh," She grunts, "I'll get over it. You'll get it down by the first, second try, no doubt. Just think up some pointers for me, huh?"

"Enk. Fine."

Reika-sensei rolls her shoulders and leads her students to the creek that runs through Training Ground 16.

"I'll demonstrate how to do this, so pay attention." Her hands shape the tiger seal, and the blue glow of chakra briefly surrounds her feet. She lifts up one foot slowly, and, exaggerating her movements, places her foot on the surface of the stream. "When you start, just put one foot down, and then put your weight on it, testing, like so." She demonstrates. "Once you're sure you're pumping out the right amount of chakra, you step fully onto the water-" she steps out, "like this, keeping the flow steady and equal in both feet. Try to keep your balance. Once you get the hang of staying up, you can start to walk. But try to stay away from the parts of fast water over the rocks – it's more difficult to walk on a swift current – and even if you manage, you might drift downstream too quickly to maintain balance. All right. Got that?"

A chorus in the affirmative.

"Then what are you waiting for?"

* * *

I hope you liked this one, for me it was sort of meh. Still, it established what it needed to establish. This story should be done before chapter 50. Chapters 43-50ish are all my notes for what I'd planned for this story. I'm sorry, I will write no more full scenes of WWTN? It's just too much for me, and I've lost my interest.

Please review.


	34. Snap Goes the Finger

Okay, so here's the next chapter of WWTN? I've lost my enthusiasm for this story, and will update every day with the few chapters I've finished.

I own neither Naruto nor Watchmen.

* * *

"…What if I cut off a finger, then mutilated it while the subject watched, huh?" Michiyo suggests, arms folded behind her head as she walks down the street towards the heart of Sizzle District. Walter shakes his head, walking at her side.

The three Genin are all splattered with paint. Today's mission had been to repaint a merchant's house located in Ember District. The only complication was that it was up to them what color to paint the house – the client didn't care. It had taken all of the three other members of Team Four to convince Michiyo that Pepso Bismol pink was not an appropriate color for a house, nor was electric blue, black, or magenta (though Reika-sensei looked tempted on that one). In the end, a creamy pale yellow was chosen for their mission. They'd found that Reika-sensei was very skilled with a brush. The merchant was pleased with the result – buttery yellow walls and crisp white trim contrasted nicely with the red tiled roof – so pleased he paid them a bonus.

"No. Drugs to prevent shock, then snap fingers, joint by joint. One hand, ten chances to confess."

"Quiet, both of you. It is almost lunch and I would like to have an appetite on a day when I am not paying for lunch." Hiko moans behind them.

"Pansy," Michiyo sneers good-naturedly. Walter just sighs at their antics.

Four weeks into their Genin careers, Team Four has settled into a comfortable routine. Up early, stamina training, sparring, mission, lunch. Reika-sensei would eat with them every other day. The three Genin took turns deciding where to eat – whoever chose on that day paid for the entire team's lunch. Then, study time while they digested, followed by intense training with their teacher, whether it be in jutsu, chakra control, teamwork, martial forms, protocol or an education in the different ninja fields – taught complete with the nastier parts the Academy teachers had glossed over. Oh yes, and 'field trips', as Reika-sensei called them – she believed in learning through hands-on experience – they'd already visited the hospital, the Decryption department, and the Administration department. Finally, a second round of sparring, and then Team Four ended the day with a cool down program of laps around the village, the number of which increased on a regular basis.

Today was just the three of them – Reika-sensei was off on a lunchtime date with her boyfriend – the older guy with the shaggy white hair and tattoos. Jiraiya or Jiro or something.

"Shut up, Hiko." Michiyo says reflexively as the poofter grumbles again. "Walter, Walter, Walter. What is it with you and breaking fingers? Though - the anti-shock drugs are a nice touch, Red. I still think adding in a little sex would fuck up the subject nicely, on a long-term interrogation basis."

"Vulgar and indecent!" The short redhead snaps.

"Seconded!" Hiko groans in relief.

"God, stuck with a prude and a wimp." She sighs.

"Location for today?" Walter queries.

"Curry!" Michiyo grins, and the boys pale. Their last experience at the curry stand had been… unpleasant. Michiyo did not actually like curry, per se, but she could handle the intensely hot flavors of everything served at _Keiko's Curry Stand_, whereas the boys could not. Walter had tried a spoonful, and gone so red that for several minutes his freckles disappeared. Michiyo had laughed herself sick. Seconds later, Hiko had announced his imminent and ignoble death by curry, tears rolling down his face from the heat, and she'd fallen off her stool, cackling in the dust of the street.

The Hyuuga and the redhead look at each other, nod, and turn to Michiyo.

"Vetoed!" They chorus. She droops.

"Way to suck, guys. Fine. Let's go to _Yuzu's. _That bland enough for you pansies?"

_Yuzu's_ serves sandwiches, burgers, and soup, but also boasts a fantastic salad bar and formidable ice cream floats.

"More than acceptable." Walter says, looking pleased. He has quite the sweet tooth. Sugar is one of the few things that made him smile, even slightly, so his teammates try to cater to that when they chose the lunch location.

"I am fine with that." Hiko allows.

"Yeah, let's go." She spins on the spot, and stops. The boys stop walking when they realize she isn't there. "Well?" She demands, several yards behind, holding her arms out from her body, "Aren't you boys going to escort me to _Yuzu's_?" Hiko and Walter sigh, then walk back to their teammate. The three link arms, and, pushing through the lunchtime crowd of Sizzle District, march to _Yuzu's_.

* * *

"Well, well, well. What do we have here?" A soft voice purrs from the alley behind _Yuzu's_.

Lunch finished and bellies full, Team Four turn to face the voice that came from the alley.

Short but slender, blue mesh and silver dress, and long fiery red hair. Kara DeWitt, top graduate of their class. Her rich green eyes survey them with distaste.

"The Hyuuga faggot. The sloppy Bride. And…" Her mouth twists in disgust at the sight of Walter, "The ugly whoreson."

"Up yours, you vindictive witch." Michiyo says, pissed.

"Oh come now, Kara." A light male voice says, and Ken Riki appears from the same alley Kara had come from. The handsome blonde boy grins, grey eyes fixated on Michiyo. "I hardly think Miss Kagami is sloppy. She has a unique quality all her own."

"Ken!" Kara gasps, and turns to him, eyes worshipful.

"Hello, Ken…" Hiko says, fluttering, a flush rising to his cheeks.

"Oh gawd, not you too…" Michiyo groans at her pink-faced teammate. Ken Riki had scored exactly average in their graduating class, but all the girls in their class adored him, for his good looks and easy charm.

"Hyuuga." Ken acknowledges coolly, and Hiko slumps.

"Where's Klika - not that I want her here - Ken?" Kara asks, and Ken frowns.

"Miss Kadiri? She's finishing up with Bill-sensei. They should be here any minute." Again Ken turns to Michiyo, eyes intent. "Hey, Michiyo. I see you've already eaten lunch, but why don't we go on a lunch date tomorrow, just you and me."

"Ken!" Kara exclaims. Michiyo gapes at the boy idol, shrinking back against Walter.

"Uh. No. I don't think so."

"Why? Your genes and grace, my skills and looks – we're a match made in heaven!" He reaches up and leans against the wall, posing. "I've been watching you for a while now, and I wouldn't mind making you my girlfriend." Next to him, Walter can feel his teammate bristle, slowly. "You must be lonely – with those losers on your team, a poofter and a freakshow – but don't worry, I'll make you feel better fast. So what do you say, go out with me?"

"After I'm done _retching_, sure!" She snarls, hand shaking as she points it at the popular boy. Her other hand grabs Walter's in search of support. "You come here and insult my friends, and expect me to like you? You may not need a nose job right now, but you will after I'm done with you, Asshole, so _piss off!_" Ken's face darkens.

"Hey freakshow – yeah you." He growls at Walter, "What are you doing, holding my girl's hand? Think she likes you? Nobody likes you, never have."

"Fuck off! You -"

"Michiyo." Walter says quietly, and she stops her line of profanity. "Cease vulgarity – can handle this fine." They drop hands self-consciously. Dreamily, he steps in front of her and the dismissed Hiko, towards Ken.

"Get away from Ken, you ugly bastard!" Kara shrieks.

"Don't – don't come near me, whoreson." Ken says uneasily as Walter takes another step, suddenly remembering Jiro Haneko's broken nose and all those fights Walter won in the Academy. "I don't want to catch any diseases from you." His fist swings at the redhead in an attempt to ward the shorter boy away

.

Walter catches it. Easy. He almost smiles, and opens the hand, holding tight. He selects a finger.

"Clearly mistaken, or under a spell. Genjutsu best broken through pain. Glad to assist."

SNAP!

Ken screams, and cradles his hand to his chest when Walter releases it.

"You're crazy!" He shouts tearfully, "What'd you do that for, you-"

"'Scuse me." A man says quietly, and all five Genin stop in their tracks.

"Bill-sensei!" Ken and Kara shout in relief. A tall, square-jawed brunette man, dressed in the standard Jounin uniform raises an eyebrow at the scene before him.

"Now, now, kids. I thought I told you to stay out of fights." He says with an easy smile, a smile that is winning for all that it is concerned. A small girl with mousy brown hair follows him, joining Kara and Ken, shyly smiling at the popular boy who does not notice her. She must be Klika Kadiri, the graduating class's dead last, Walter recalls.

"But they-" Kara protests.

"-Yes, I'm sure. But I know you guys, see, and one of you's always starting fights. There's a lesson to be learned here – don't start fights you can't finish, let alone win."

"Never reckoned you for a teacher, Bill. Not after all that trouble in the Academy, Mr. Do-it-for-a-Dollar Bill." Reika-sensei says, sidling into view around the taller man. She's easily dwarfed by him. A skinny, shy-looking man, also in typical Jounin gear appears behind her.

"Byron," Bill says with a smile, and he receives a shaky smile from the other man, who stops at Bill's side.

"Bill." The other man says. They sort of lean against each other, the backs of their hands brushing, fingers briefly entwined.

"Well, I see you guys have met Team One, led by Bill Brady. He and Byron Lewis are my old teammates from – golly – years ago." Reika-sensei says with a smile.

"Well, we'd better split." Bill says to Reika, frowning. "We still haven't done our mission for today, and Ken will need to visit the hospital now. Try to control that redhead of yours a little more, though, please."

"Walter is a ninja all his own, Bill." She sighs, "I'll talk to him, and see he learns. But Mr. Riki here needs to control his tongue as well."

"Swell. Story of my life, Reika-chan, story of my life." Bill sighs, and then he's frog-marching his team off towards Flare District, where the Konoha Hospital is located.

Byron stammers a farewell, heading towards the heart of Sizzle District, searching for his own team – Team Two.

Reika-sensei puts her hands on her shapely hips and just looks at Team Four, head tilted.

"I see you've met some of your fellow Genin. And broken Mr. Ken Riki's finger. Broken bones are not acceptable behavior towards allies, and you will be severely punished for it if you do it again. Do you understand?" She says sharply.

"Yes."

"Care to tell me why you did it?"

"Harassment." Walter supplies. Michiyo snorts.

"Collectively? They called my boys here a faggot, whoreson, and a freakshow, sensei."

"Riki swung the first blow." Walter adds gruffly.

"Ken didn't do anything wrong." Hiko protests, scowling.

"Pht! Fangirl." Michiyo spits, hazel eyes flashing. "Your crush just insulted you to your face, and you support him?"

Hiko says nothing, turning his face away. Walter looks on in disapproval.

"This is something you guys will need to sort out on your own, team-wise." Reika-sensei says quietly. "It's just a part of growing up."

"Sucks." Michiyo mutters. Their teacher simply shrugs.

"Well, now that you've eaten, it's study time. I've got new books for you guys." Reika-sensei smiles as the three perk up immediately. She knows she's spoken the magic words, at least for these kids. "Hiko – I have two basic guides to beginner's sealing, picked up some medic-nin flyers too, from the hospital. Michiyo – a guide to intermediate genjutsu and a basic interrogation pamphlet. Walter – strategy, encryption, and history. Let's head for the Sakura Park in Ash District. I need a change from Training Ground 16."

Nodding in unison, Team Four takes to the rooftops.

* * *

That's it for today.


	35. Shocking

Okay, major gore rating here. Also, remember that the ultimate pairing is DanxRor despite what happens here.

* * *

Thirteen months since graduation, and they never anticipated this, not so soon.

Hiko stands watch, perched high in a tree, Byakugan blazing, seeing through everything, in all directions.

Walter stands over the prone body of the Rock-nin, hands braced in a Snake seal. It's the first time he's used this jutsu in the field, but he's practiced enough to hold it easily. Earth Style: Pottery Restraint technique, where the ground itself restrains the target.

Michiyo kneels, arms deep in the Rock-nin's guts, who is still alive despite the gaping cut in his belly. Bloodied knives lie on the ground beside her, ready to be used again.

"Where is your team's rendezvous point?" She demands. The ninja spits weakly at her, missing. She smiles, that closed lipped smile of hers. "Fine. We'll do this your way." She separates one coil of intestine from the mess, wrapping it around her fist. Then pauses, and looks to Walter for approval.

"Do it." Walter says, and Michiyo jerks her head in a nod. Walter's not sure how he became the leader in Reika-sensei's absence, but he is now, and it feels natural. Like he always has been, and they've just taken a while to realize it fully. "Do what needs to be done, Michiyo."

Michiyo squeezes, and the man screams, wetly. His voice is wrecked, and she can see his diaphragm flex as he breathes.

It's been six hours since they were separated from their teacher. It was just another C-rank patrol, their tenth, and they'd found them boring but simultaneously exhilarating so far. Staying alert but finding nothing.

Not this patrol.

Forty minutes' travel from Konoha, Team Four crossed paths with a team of eight Hidden Rock ninja, and tumbled into a confrontation. Reika-sensei had hidden her Genin with a genjutsu, allowing them to safely back her up with thrown kunai and long-distance jutsu. They'd taken out one cleanly, wounded another, and their teacher had killed three others before the enemy knocked her out and carried her away, dragging the wounded man with them. It was then that Team Four revealed themselves, but they were caught up in battle with the one man that remained behind. They'd killed him after twenty minutes of frantic battle. After checking, and ensuring that the dead were truly dead, Team Four began pursuit of the enemy, opting to rescue their sensei rather than return missing a member.

They'd run across this man, alone, knocked him from the trees with the combined effort of a waterspout-like water jutsu from Walter and a paralyzing lightning jutsu from Michiyo, and finally, subdued him through Hiko's Juuken. Then, they'd pinned him and restrained him with Walter's Pottery Restraint.

The shinobi is breathing sharply through his nose, biting down hard on his lip.

"Again, Michiyo." Walter commands.

She obliges. The Rock-nin draws blood on his lip before shrieking, spraying Michiyo's cheek with a few stray flecks of blood from his lip.

"Again." Fist closes again, hard this time, drawing another scream.

"Fuck!" The man gasps, "Fuck – you're just kids, fuckin' brats… Hell, man!"

"Your team took our Jounin sensei, and for that you die." Walter murmurs, words coming to his mouth easily, full sentences suddenly easier now than out-of-combat, and he smiles, feeling light and high. He knows his face echoes Michiyo's dreamy smile. "Tell us where they would take her, and my teammate will make it a quick death. Michiyo, remind him."

"'Kay." She sighs happily, and _pulls_.

When the man's noise dies down, Walter continues.

"It's up to you to tell us, and the truth this time, or we'll do nothing. We'll just leave you, tied up, to bleed to death, slowly. Painfully, for your sins. With us gone, anything could happen to you. Perhaps the wildlife will investigate, and find a meal. Maybe the maggots will hatch from their eggs, and you will feel them writhe in your flesh as you die. Or we might shatter your hands and feet, gag you so you can't bite your tongue and bleed to death swiftly, and then snap your arms and legs. Or maybe sever something and cauterize the blood vessels shut. The woman your team captured taught us multiple fire techniques that could be utilized in such a fashion…"

"Sick, my gods you're all sick!" The Rock-nin sputters.

"That's a matter of opinion, bucko." Michiyo says, "Hidden Leaf wasn't the one who started this war, by the way. It was Hidden Rock."

"We're only doing what's right! The Leaf has long stood behind their sick child protégées, you say you're soft but you're all just a bunch of hypo—Aaieee!"

Crunch.

The man's words cut off and gurgle in his throat. Walter raises his sandal off the shinobi's now-crushed hand. With a grunt, he crouches next to the man's face and grabs the enemy's chin in a purple gloved hand, tilting it towards him.

"You seem to be forgetting something," The redhead growls softly, "You are in no position to be speaking like that. Speak of my village that way yet again and I'll gouge your eyes out with my hands. What rank are you?"

"Special-Jounin."

"War must be lowering Hidden Rock's standards." The man's face twists in anger, but he stays quiet.

"Wise to stay quiet. Where is the rendezvous point for your squad? I'm beginning to feel impatient…"

A tear rolls down the man's cheek, but he gives up a line of coordinates which Walter writes down carefully.

"How many in your team originally? And their ranks."

"Eight. Two Jounin, me, another Special-Jounin, and four Chuunin."

"And finally, your name." The Special-Jounin swallows, dark eyes staring at Walter.

"Ryuuji. Ryuuji Iwahi." Walter nods.

"Michiyo, to me. Hiko," He raises his voice to reach the Hyuuga. "Come down." A soft pat as Hiko lands easily, padding over quietly. A quick glance at the other boy reveals that he is pale and sweating, and obviously not at ease. "Have you ever killed before?" Hiko goes green, and shakes his head.

"Yes, but not in cold blood." Michiyo says softly beside him. "I killed the guy back in the clearing. I don't think Hiko did, but one of us killed that guy ten hours ago, y'know." Walter sighed.

"Not counting that possibility, this will be my first time, perhaps. But this isn't killing in cold blood. It's justice. We'll do it together, as one, more mercy than he deserves. A team kill."

"Kids, just fuckin' kids." Ryuuji Iwahi whimpers.

"My name is Walter Kovacs." Walter tells the man, "And this is Michiyo Kagami, and Hiko Hyuuga. Goodbye." He selects a long knife, and his teammates place their hands on the handle. Hiko's hand is trembling. They bring it down over the Rock-nin's throat.

"_Now."_

The knife cuts cleanly. Ryuuji Iwahi closes his eyes, last breath sighing out of the cut, his body going still. Blood spurts over their hands in slowing pulses, and Hiko drops his grip on the knife to run and vomit several yards away.

"Knife's yours." Michiyo says softly, and pulls back her hand. Walter changes to a tighter grip, an icepick grip, and idly knifes the still-warm corpse in the heart, just to be thorough. It barely twitches.

He pulls himself away from the body and stands. Michiyo shifts closer, and presses a small hand to his shoulderblade. Her hand is bloody but warm, and Walter can't bring himself to push her away. It feels good. The relative silence of the forest is jarring after the noises of torture.

He shifts his balance as she leans against him, pressing herself to his back.

"Too quiet, Michiyo."

"So you're talking all fragmented again, huh?"

"…Yes." (Strange, really, how easy the words had come during the interrogation. Walter has never been a smooth-talker, but in that bloody haze he'd temporarily achieved the crystalline coherency he'd always dreamed of reaching.)

"Hunh. No, I guess… It felt funny, though, the blood, and the screams. Doin' it. It felt right, y'know?"

"...Did." He admits. (This too is unusual, because isn't it wrong to enjoy killing? But no, no, a voice that sounds like Reika-sensei says. Ninja must kill. Assassination, war, killing-intent… Ninja must kill and not go insane, because sometimes, killing is just part of the job.)

"You were amazing. Back there." He turns to face her.

"Flattery." He comments drily, and the unbloodied skin on Michiyo's face flushes. She drops eye contact.

"I just thought… After we get Reika-sensei back, if we live… Take me out on a date?"

He stares, mouth slightly open.

"…What?"

"Go out with me?"

"Why?"

"I hate to interrupt this charming display of romance, but we have a Jounin to rescue." Hiko drawls, and Walter takes an awkward step away from Michiyo. "The now-deceased Ryuuji Iwahi was expected to rendezvous with his team at the given coordinates in two hours, which gives us very little time to prepare a proper retrieval of our teacher. We are going to impersonate him, correct?"

"Yes." Walter confirms. "Michiyo is best at this, will do it." He turns to her, "Had a good look at the Rock-nin – Ryuuji Iwahi – before interrogation?" Michiyo nods, all business now.

"Yeah, I should be able to duplicate his look with a henge, and I saw how he moved when we took him down, so we're good."

"Act injured, in multiple places, a wound on face that hinders speaking, act walking wounded – his team will less quickly suspect imposter then. Person in shock behaves different than when healthy."

"This is just to get them off guard for the big attack, yeah?"

"Correct, three Rock shinobi left then, one wounded – assuming they did not meet reinforcements. No need for long impersonation, just to get them off guard." His two teammates nod. "Look for Reika-sensei."

"If she's not there, kill all but one." Michiyo nods, hazel eyes hard.

"Same for them as this one then." She jerks her thumb over her shoulder at the bloody corpse behind her. "We just gonna leave him here?"

"No. Hiko, seal him up." The Hyuuga smiles, pleased to finally do something that's his forte. He pulls out a small scroll and unseals a large jug of ink and a thick brush. He crouches on the ground and begins to paint an intricately glyphed circle around the body.

"This should take at least a foot of the forest floor with it, so all the blood spill should be covered." He comments, wrinkling his nose at the stench of blood and death and perforated intestines. That is Hiko, ever-fastidious.

"So," Michiyo says, almost conversationally, as they watch their teammate work, "Worst case-scenario, we're facing two healthy Jounin and an injured Special-Jounin. I'm ready to die, are you?" Hiko snorts. Walter just shakes his head.

"Will use team jutsu – Water Style: Ice Needles, blood variant."

Team jutsu were rare, but Reika-sensei had taught them the few she knew – it was rare for a team to reach the right balance and teamwork to master team jutsu – but they needed all the advantages they could get to survive the war, she had explained to them, not seven months ago.

"Wait – blood variant? I'm used to the local water, air moisture and groundwater one, but blood?"

"Hm. Yes. Discovered it myself. Changing ram seal at end of sequence to dog seal draws water from targeted living creatures rather than moisture in air or from water table. Worked on plants, squirrels, and one rabbit. Should work on humans. Sixty percent of human body made of water – simple but effective."

"And deadly." Hiko says from his crouch, channeling chakra into his seal. With a soft poof, the man's body and blood disappear, leaving a once blank scroll full, scrawled with black ink that matches the seal Hiko just drew in miniature. Hiko pockets the corpse-filled scroll. "A jutsu that causes the enemy's blood to transform into needles?" He continues, "Possibly worth classifying as a forbidden jutsu."

"Glad you're on my side, then." Michiyo says, then shakes herself. "Sounds doable, at least. Dog seal instead of ram, okay. We'd better get going, yeah?"

"Hnk." She takes that as an affirmative, and with a pop, transforms into the now-deceased Ryuuji Iwahi.

"Let do this!" She says in the dead man's voice, careful to wheeze like she/he's broken a rib.

"Yes. Mission to retrieve our teacher begins now."

* * *

Reviews are nice.


	36. Rescue

Squick warning for rape.

* * *

The plan goes as scripted, until they see Reika-sensei. There's only two Rock-nin left, perhaps the wounded man died of his injuries, or something. Team Four does not know. Team Four does not care.

They feel cold.

Half of the kunoichis are raped at least once in their career, but up until now it was just a statistic to them.

Michiyo miraculously keeps herself together, and continues the charade as the Rock-nin they tortured and killed. One of the Hidden Rock shinobi fusses over her genjutsu-generated wounds, while the other man prods Reika-sensei's prone but awake body with a sandaled foot. Michiyo keeps her head down and waits for Walter's signal.

It was Hiko's idea, to use seals as a means of communication. Each member of Team Four has a small spiral tattooed on their dominant arm's wrist, circled by delicate script. By channeling a tiny pulse of chakra into the mark, they can communicate with each other through Morse code, or alternately, ANBU tap-code.

It is for the pulsed signal that Michiyo waits for, grunting in faux-pain at her Rock-nin nurse as he bandages the seemingly nasty gash on her shoulder.

There. Three pulses on her wrist, unmistakable. Walter's unique chakra signature, like static on her tongue and a slight bitterness.

She pulls out the kunai she's been pretending to bite down on against the pain, and shoves it through her nurse's eye in one smooth movement. He recoils, reeling, hands instinctually going to his face, and his teammate leaps to his feet, shouting.

Walter and Hiko explode into the clearing, hands already flashing through seals. She pulls out the kunai from the man's eye socket, grabbing his blue hair for leverage, and shoves it in again with a meaty squelch. He flails and screams. She raps hard on her blade hand with her free hand, driving it in further. The man falls finally with a choked off gurgle as she lets go, unsheaths her kodachi and rams it through his throat. Blood splatters her face in an arterial gush.

There's an explosion as the two boys' synchronized jutsu go off with a flash. The last man topples to the ground, smoking. The three Genin converge on him carefully as he rolls on the ground in agony. But he isn't down yet, and he grabs Hiko's foot and yanks. The Hyuuga falls with a yell, and Walter is there to score a solid kick to the man's head. Michiyo pins the man with two deftly thrown shuriken, and then Walter begins the seals for an acid spitting technique, as Hiko climbs quickly to his feet.

"Team Four. Hold." Reika-sensei's voice is wrecked, but they obey. Walter pins the man's hands to the ground for good measure. Hiko pulls out a kunai and cuts her bonds. Their silver-haired teacher rises with a wince, her leggings in tatters around her groin, blood dripping down. "He's mine. I would have my revenge on him."

The man tries to gather himself to his feet, for what they know not. Walter gives him another good kick that sends him down again.

"Michiyo – your kodachi, please." The girl retrieves the short sword from her kill's neck, gives it over. Reika-sensei hefts it, considering. Then she strikes, and the man's head falls to the ground, the body sitting upright for a few moments before slumping onto the leafy forest floor.

There is silence as Reika-sensei stares at the corpse for a long time. Then her shoulders slump and she looks around the clearing, at the body of the other dead man. Blood continues to trickle sluggishly down her thighs.

"I expect you've had your first kills now, correct?" Her voice, hoarse from either screaming or the effort of not screaming, is unusually sharp. "Well?" she demands when there is no response.

"Yes, ma'am." They murmur.

"I expected as much. Michiyo, Walter, check yourselves for any wounds that would hinder a full run back to the village, and seal these two enemy-nin up - you've watched Hiko do it often enough. Hiko, come over here and help me bandage myself up, I have need of that medic-nin training you've begun. I should be angry at you for disobeying my orders, but then, I might not be alive if you hadn't. I will write you up for it, but I won't punish you myself – and only because this was a standard patrol, and you were not failing a purposeful mission. If you had been carrying information, or carrying out surveillance, this would have killed your career utterly, and unredeemably."

"Sorry," Walter whispers. She nods, sort of smiles in a way that has nothing to do with happiness, and they don't know it now, but she'll never be the same again.

"Let's go kiddos. I need to wash this filth off me." She heads to a tangle of bushes that might provide some modicum of privacy. Hiko follows.

Walter begins to assess himself, rolling his shoulders to feel for any cuts, pulled muscles that adrenaline may have overwhelmed. He finds a few small cuts, mostly bruises and sore muscles. He cleans them with a alcohol wipe in his hip pouch, bandages them just in case.

He doesn't regret it, Walter realizes, the killing and torturing. He'd do it again, in a heartbeat. He looks over at Michiyo, who has finished her own checks. She has a fresh bandage around her waist, and knee, covering wounds received in the melee. She's pawing over the corpses. Looting. She's looting the corpses, and despite no regrets, he is almost repulsed.

_No, restocking. Perfectly acceptable. Battling with thrown weapons mean there are always tools missing. It makes sense to restock on the field, be it from enemy or ally._ Says a voice that must be born of that moment (high on something fleeting and ephemeral) as blood had soaked his hands and his grip on the knife had shook a little (his hands usually so steady) and the power and confidence he had felt – it felt—

"Hey!" Michiyo exclaims, "Walter, come on over here! Found something!" She rolls the man over and pulls a scroll from a side pouch. Walter slouches over and peers over her shoulder.

"A blood seal?" He wonders, and she shakes her head.

"No I've seen blood seals at the Kagami clan manor and this looks, y'know, different. Can't figure what it is though. This document must be important, to seal it, yeah?"

"Will ask Reika-sensei and Hiko."

"Yeah."

They wait patiently for their teammate to attend to their teacher's wound. An idea hits Walter when he remembers Reika-sensei's tattered leggings.

"Hey, what're you doin'?" Michiyo queries in confusion, as Walter squats next to the body and begins to undo the button and fly of the corpse.

"Sensei needs pants," He grunts, tugging the clothing off the man's hips, difficult to do with rigor mortis setting in. "Michiyo, need help." She quickly crouches down to help, and together they wrestle the man's pants off. Once the garment is off they set it and the scroll aside, and begin to seal the bodies and blood into their own scrolls kept empty and carried around for the express purpose of storage sealing.

The look on Reika-sensei's face, a brief but genuine smile, is worth it when Walter presents the trousers to her.

"You're a good man, Walter Kovacs." She pulls them on over her leggings, and uses a length of wire in lieu of a belt. "Everything cleaned up?"

"Yep." Michiyo nods, "An' we found this." She holds up the scroll. Reika-sensei takes it, and holds it up to examine.

"Well, well, well. This is sealed with a chakra lock. That's not an easy scroll seal, so this must be valuable." She shoves it into her hip pouch and zips it. "Better get back to Konoha fast then, so the Encryption Department can look at it, and unravel it. Ready?"

Team Four murmurs their assent, and then all four of them take to the trees, letting Reika-sensei set the pace.

* * *

Reviews are greatly appreciated.


	37. Repercussions

I no own, you no sue.

* * *

"Well, fuck me hard and slap me."

"Language, Jiraiya." The Third Hokage reprimands, "Though I might understand where you're coming from."

"Yeah, yeah, Old Man. Who knew sweet, curvy Reika-chan had it in her?"

"I am more concerned about her team. Your typical Genin team cannot take out three Chuunin, and a Special-Jounin, however newly fledged the man was, and all without major injuries."

"Not your usual team though – DeWitt's bastard kid, a Hyuuga. The Kagami girl isn't normal though – that clan is full of milk-sops – should've been a dead weight, if you ask me. Who knows where she gets it from."

"You are forgetting that it is the mixture of Kagami blood and other strong clans that often produce the geniuses of their generation."

"Like Orochimaru, ay? He was one." The older man winces.

"Not the example I was going to say, but yes, he was one of those geniuses birthed by a Kagami woman."

"Got what was coming to him." Jiraiya mutters, and his old teacher just sighs and scratches his head under the wide hat he wears in recognition of his office.

"Yes, he did. Returning to the point, I believe I know what to do with Team Four. The Chuunin Exam may be still going in Hidden Cloud, but Hidden Rock and Hidden Leaf did not show well or reach the final exam because of resource protection in the uncertain prospect of war. Of course it's out in the open now, so we are better informed to make decisions. Rock will be sending three teams to the Exams in Hidden Mist, I think we should match them, and send Team Four as one of the three. I believe if we pull them from the front and continue the six months of intense training their teacher started them with, we will reap three new Chuunin in six months time. A good show of strength from Konoha."

"Should give them orders to terminate any Rock Genin if possible, as well." Jiraiya offers, and smirks, "That might be easy compared to what they did to a fresh Special-Jounin. A successful field interrogation, not only that – their first interrogation - and they're year-old Genin. No doubt about it, I'm taking Reika-chan out tonight for a job well done." The Third nods.

"She certainly deserves it after everything she's done." The Toad Sage winces. "I did not mean the unfortunate result of that patrol. Let her know of our proposal over dinner, but she must keep it under wraps for the next three months."

"I got it. Is that everything?" The white-haired man wonders as he stands up. The Hokage inclines his head slightly.

"For today."

"See you, sensei." The younger man turns his back, waves over his shoulder, and closes the door behind himself. Leaving the Hokage to his neat but endless piles of paperwork.

* * *

Light jazz plays in the background, the restaurant interior dark-hued and intimately lit, elegant chairs upholstered in comfortable burgundy leather that squeaks as he sits.

"So," Jiraiya says conversationally as Reika takes a sip of her wine, "Guess what? Your team's going to the Chuunin Exams. Congrats!"

Caught off guard, she sprays a mouthful of good Shiraz-Cabernet in his face.

"Oh my god," she moans, hurriedly wiping her mouth with her napkin before offering it to Jiraiya.

"No, no, I've got my own, it's fine." He says hurriedly, dabbing at his face and dress shirt, and she takes it back, spreading it back on her lap.

"I'm so sorry – I wasn't expecting that, obviously." Reika sits back into her chair. She's wearing a lilac and periwinkle sundress – not as racy as she usually wears on their dates, not after the recent violation (which, quite frankly, has left both of them fumbling for safe topics and activities.) Without sex, they're beginning to realize, they don't have much to do together, really.

"It doesn't matter," but then a thought occurs to him (reality is stranger than fiction), and he has to pull out the little notepad Reika got him – the one he carries with him everywhere he goes, to jot down ideas (or sketch exceptional feminine figures he might have the pleasure to view) – and writes it down. It breaks the ice and Reika smiles when she sees the little book is almost full.

"You've gotten a lot of use out of that, then?"

"You bet. Constantly. Inspiration's everywhere. Why, just the other day I was down at the hot springs in Blaze District-" Reika snickers, smile spreading slowly and affectionately across her face.

"Oh, Jiraiya, what am I going to do with you?"

"Well-"

"I talked with Tsunade yesterday. At the hospital."

He couldn't help it. He went quiet and even perked up at the name, and she noticed.

"We talked about you, you know. She's almost ready to let go of Dan and move on, from what I can tell." She would know – her specialty was intelligence, particularly drawing information from people discreetly, often her targets didn't even suspect the kinds of conclusions she could make from simply looking at them, or listening. "I know I'm not up for much play anymore, and we're friends with benefits, but without the benefits bit, which just makes us friends that go on dates. And I know you love her, waited for her, even though she's taking _forever_ to come around." Jiraiya smiles a little at that. "I'm tired of playing games, and this thing we have, it feels like a game, doesn't it?"

"We all have our part to play." He replies simply. Reika sighs, and shakes her head, pale hair loose for once. She looks down, contemplatively.

"This last mission made me realize, I don't want to play games. I've always been a loose woman - maybe because I'm trying to compensate for what my father did to me and my sisters – and I don't want my students to realize one day what I screw-up I've been the whole time, not if I can help it. No offence, but we've never been serious, and from what I can tell, your feelings haven't changed. God, listen to me. Try to talk normally, and it all comes out like a speech. You take me on a date in a nice restaurant and I spray you with wine and break up with you."

"No, baby, I get where you're coming from. So no more sex and dates. That's fine. Still friends?" He asks anxiously, and Reika's smile is watery.

"Good friends. Don't you doubt it." She reaches out to give his hand a squeeze. "You're a good man, I'm just not going to use you anymore."

"I dunno, I kinda liked using you, myself." The Toad Sage leers, and that does it for Reika. The sadness flees from her face, replaced by that dry, tell-tale amusement he's always tried to draw from her. "You'll still model for me, right, my lovely?"

"Only if you let me beta-read your books. You need a bit of quality control, and you haven't had anything near a rape happen in those books, and so help me, you never will."

"Oh come on, I live in a ninja village. Even _I_ have ethics about that kind of stuff!" Reika crosses her arms, pleased.

"Good. So. Chuunin Exams?" Her eyebrow quirks, and he chuckles.

"Yeah. Those little demons of yours." Reika snorts inelegantly.

"Right, Mr. Sensei-of-Leaf's-Yellow-Flash. As if you can talk about that to me."

"Why thank you. That was a compliment, no? You trained those suckers well. Field interrogation, Ms. Reika Gintaki? A successful first field interrogation?"

"You got it. My name would probably be on the Hero's Memorial Stone if it wasn't for their disobedience. I was a little surprised at how blood-thirsty they became as soon as their first kill was over. They're going to surpass me, you know. Maybe not at intelligence or undercover work, but Hiko is excelling in sealing and medicine as well as his family's fighting style, Michiyo is the friendliest thirteen-year-old with the instincts of a killer I've met, and Walter? Walter could be anything. Awkward socially, I've mentioned that before, but massive stamina, precise chakra control, sharp mind. Good at everything except people. I'm telling you, sweets, they soak everything I give them up like a sponge. I don't think teaching was allowed to be this easy."

"So you think your kids are ready for Chuunin rank?"

"They'd handle it fine. Socially, they need to mature a little, but on the front, and tactically? They're ready to lead."

"So you're on board with the Third's idea?"

"Yes. Team Four will represent Leaf's strength, without a doubt."

"We're considering adding an official suggestion, as well."

"…Yes? Out with it, Jiraiya."

"If Team Four can, during the Exam, take out as many Rock Genin as they can, while following Exam rules, and still pass the tests, they are to do so. If they succeed, they will be paid a bonus, as if it was an official mission, but off the books, so it would be a payment of resources, extended clearance, or information."

"I'll have to ask them. Who knows? They might not want extra blood on their hands, but I think Walter and Michiyo would be glad to, and Hiko would do it for the resource payment alone."

"Team of bloody-minded bookworms!" He exclaimed.

Reika threw her head back and cackled. By the time she calmed enough to simply giggle, their waiter had delivered their appetizers and assured them their entrees would be ready soon.

"You have no idea how accurate that is, sweets." Reika said with a final giggle. Jiraiya shrugged and popped a parmesan-zucchini crisp into his mouth.

"When are you planning to bind your kids to that Summoning Contract of yours?"

"I hadn't thought of that, not yet." She says, dipping her bread in basil-infused olive oil before eating it neatly, licking crumbs and oil from her fingertips.

"Now's the time to do it – I let Minato sign the Toad Contract several months before his own Chuunin Exam. It'll give them an extra edge, as long as they have enough chakra to summon their partners."

"My contract is not like the Grand Summoning Contract, however. The cats don't grow as large as Gamabunta or Katsuyu. It uses less chakra – the blood doesn't need to be fresh, it's just there to prove the summoner's identity – and anyway, the chakra is just a beacon – the cats come on their own. It's all up to them, and not all the cats accept the summoner as a partner."

"Fascinating. You'll have to give me at look at the contract sometime. But anyway. You owe those kids your life – maybe it's time to trust them with your family."

"Maybe."

Their food arrives, and they tuck in, conversation halted for now. As she eats, Reika has a contemplative look in her green-grey eyes.


	38. Dating Follies

Warning for non-DanxRor romancey stuff.

* * *

t's mid-autumn, September, and the summer rains have stopped, the temperature dipping between brisk, windy chill and lingering warmth. Fall is a dry season in Konoha. Wildfire season. Heart's Bloom and Fire Blossom are in season as well – both popular with lovers and unique to Fire Country, rare autumnal flowers.

The trees are still thick with verdant leaves, beginning to dry in the sudden lack of rain. Unlike in the more temperate parts of the country currently ablaze with red, orange, gold and brown foliage – the very yearly display that is the cause of Fire Country's name - Hidden Leaf's forests do not drop their leaves until late November.

They stand at the very border between Sizzle District and Flicker District, at their designated meeting place every morning, right at the corner across from the sandwich shop.

"So." Says Michiyo.

"So." Walter echoes.

She says nothing more, just fiddles with her glossy black hair, uncharacteristically quiet. Not shy, per se – Michiyo is not capable of shyness – but hesitant. He grunts quietly, tilted his head in unspoken query, and this time she meets his blue eyes with her own hazel ones. Her gaze is uncertain but defiant.

"I asked," She starts slowly, "In the middle of that big mess of our last patrol, if you'd go out with me."

"You did." He's never needed to talk much with her; she's always divined his meaning from the meager words he can offer.

"You asked why. And I never answered. So I'll tell you." She stuffs her hands in the pockets of her capris. "You listen to me, and you actually pay attention and take me seriously. You see me, Michiyo, and not a Kagami Bride. You don't pull back when I touch you anymore, y'know, and I know that means something. You get that twitchy smile of yours when my jokes are good enough. The way you move - I could watch you fight all day, and you're smart and strong and creative. I know you're not good with people, but you're nice to everyone who respects you." She shrugs. "And I like that. That's why."

"Oh." He thinks about it. Everything she has said is true, appropriate, and decent. "Fine."

She smiles, closed-lipped, dimples forming on both cheeks. Smiles for him.

"But no whorish behavior." He warns, and she gives him a look.

"_Walter._" Michiyo says crisply, imitating Reika-sensei's wry tone. "You're fourteen. I'm thirteen. Sex is kinda gross, y'know."

That settles it for him.

"Right," He agrees, corner of his lip turning up. "Hrnh. Michiyo. Be my girlfriend?"

"I'd be delighted to, Walter Kovacs." She drawls, and he gives her a dry look that sends her into fits of laughter. He just sighs, and turns to head to Training Ground 16. She follows.

* * *

Reika-sensei has given them a week's vacation after the disastrous patrol-turned rescue. Light training only, she insists, and meet up at the usual spot in seven days.

Retroactively, the C-rank has been upgraded to A-rank, and they've been paid a nice bonus for not just the patrol but also the successful rescue, the sealed scroll, and the bounties on their kills' heads. Granted, salary is down during wartime, and resources are tight. They haven't been paid in cash, but in credit, and cheap favors. The payment comes in discounts at various stores, restaurants and entertainment venues in the village. It comes in increased clearance – High Genin-level access - to most C-Rank material. They're ecstatic. Now, if only Hiko can get access to the experiment lab the hospital owns, everything would be perfect.

* * *

Two days into official couplehood, Walter is beginning to have, not exactly doubts, but worries. He meets Michiyo at _Yuzu's_ for lunch. Prohibited from training, they dress in civilian clothes.

"Michiyo."

"Hmn?"

"What do I do as a boyfriend?" She looks up from her fish and chips.

"Well, I guess it depends on the couple, y'know?"

"No. What. Do you expect?" Michiyo blinks, then closes her mouth.

"Well, to hold hands, or kiss a little. Being really close friends? Going to lunch or a movie, or extra training? Rare thoughtful gifts or gestures? I dunno, Walter, just us being closer and more open, that's all."

"Oh." He thinks about that, shoveling some Sloppy Joe and a bit of bun into his mouth.

"You didn't know what couples do, didja? Other than sex."

"Not surprising. Consider mother."

"Well, guess not." She concedes, "You don't have to do anything you don't want to. That's part of a healthy relationship."

He can do that. No sex, nothing degrading to either of them, just… trusting vulnerability.

"Where did you learn this? Obviously no previous experience in relationships."

"Oh, that. Well, you know how the Hyuuga clan teaches all their kids how to use their eyes, and the Gentle Fist style?" He nods. "The Kagami clan teaches all the girls how to have a happy, faithful marriage, even if you don't love your husband, and how to raise healthy children. The whole point of the Kagami clan is to have babies, and supply Hidden Leaf with decent ninja. Not that I agree, y'know. I don't want to marry someone because of their blood, or to extend the clan's influence."

"A good ambition." He approves, and she grins at the praise.

"Good. Now, about that variation of the Ice Needle technique…" He takes a long slurp of his coke and dives back into the conversation.

* * *

Over the week off, they train together lightly. Not really training so much as comparing notes, working on fine-tuning Walter's genjutsu and speeding up Michiyo's seal speed. They jog together in the morning, have lunch together. Hiko is suspiciously absent. He's been spending all his time at the Hyuuga clan compound, doing what exactly they do not know, but he's been missing since the beginning of the week.

Spending so much time together, Walter quickly establishes his boundaries.

No holding hands in public, but he'll let her rest her hand in the crook of his bent elbow as they walk through the village.

No kissing in public beyond a dry peck, and only in greeting and goodbye, if at all. The exception is an experiment during a very frank discussion of French kissing. Michiyo declares that sex and tonsil-hockey (as she calls it) are both disgusting, and Walter heartily agrees.

"What does that taste like anyway?" She wonders, and Walter grunts, going pink under his freckles. "C'mon let's touch tongues."

"Said disgusting, Michiyo." The dark-haired girl shrugs.

"For science, Walter." He relents.

"Fine. For science." Walter says drily. They stick their tongues out as far as they can go, feeling stupid, and bob heads together for a second, tongue-tip just barely touching tongue-tip, then pull away. Tongues go back in mouths, and they look away, thinking, faces beet red.

"Tongues taste like tongues." Michiyo concludes, and he snorts through his embarrassment. Disgusting.

"Expecting something different?"

"Well, yeah. At least from what I've read of my sister's books. It's always all swoopy and sweet or spicy tasting."

"Thought you didn't like romance books."

"I don't. But Mikoto said don't diss it if you haven't tried it, so I read like, four or five. I tried it, and now I can still diss it, only with real life examples, y'know? Mikoto totally buys the Kagami Bride thing. She's got her eyes on the Uchiha heir."

"Ambitious."

"Yeee-up. You got it. My dad wants me to go after one of the Ino-Shika-Cho guys. They're what, like, a year older than you, two years more than me?"

"Except for Shikaku Nara. Three years older than teammates. To lazy to do well in school, barely passed."

"Inoichi Yamanaka is vain, hollow-brained, and a pansy." Michiyo decrees. Walter nods.

"Chouza Akimichi is fat. Unmotivated. And a glutton."

"Right." She agrees, "So that leaves them out. Then there's our class, five teams. Both Team Six, and Seventeen died on the front. That's Team Four, One, and Two left." She's getting into it now, ticking names off on her fingers. "Team Two. Yutaro Shizo is dating Hisoka Takada, and they look really serious. Genji Kobe is from an old clan, but my second-cousin Anitara Kagami is already chasing him. Ken Riki is a narcissistic sleazeball. Hiko is gay."

"Leaves me." Her animated face shuts down at that.

"No. Your dad was a big hero. But I'm not dating you because of that."

"Just pointing out that -"

"I said. No." She snaps.

"But-"

"Just don't." She interrupts, and he growls at her rudeness.

"Can't talk like normal people?" She sniffs at that, and they glare at each other, and then look away, picking angrily at their meal. The food at _Yuzu's_ is delicious, for all that it is unassuming, and soothes his temper considerably. When the waitress comes over, he orders a slice of apple pie for himself, and a molten chocolate cake slice for Michiyo. It's a little pricey, especially when he's paying for it, but it's her favorite, and maybe she'll understand his intent.

Really, she says she likes him for his qualities. She wouldn't… No. She wouldn't.

But she stays silent for the rest of the day, barely speaking even as they train together.

And just like that, they've had their first fight.

This dating business is harder than he thought.

* * *

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	39. Education

I no own, you no sue.

* * *

One by one, Team Four arrives at Reika-sensei's apartment. _No more than light training for the week,_ she had said. _ Try to enjoy your time off, and come to my home for dinner on the seventh day._ Walter was surprised to discover that his teacher lived in the same apartment complex as him – only she rented out a set of rooms on the pricier top floor.

The assemble outside her door, first Hiko, who waits silently. Walter shows up, but it's not until Michiyo arrives that they knock on the door. Walter takes her hand and gives it a brief squeeze in greeting (a kiss is too indecent in front of company) and she dimples at him. Hiko's eyebrows raise but he remains quiet for once.

When she answers the door, Reika-sensei is wearing not her typical purple wrap shirt and leggings, but instead a white sweater and jeans. It seems even she is making a concession towards the cooling weather.

"Hey guys." She smiles, letting them in. They assess the smile on her face quickly. It's not as bright as they're used to, but less strained than a week ago.

The main room of her apartment is spacious, with walls painted a calm tea green, brass lamps lighting a squashy grey couch. Several black and white ink paintings hang on the wall, and Walter surmises that she must have done them herself, from what she's spoken of her hobbies, and sure enough, upon closer look he can see her signature squiggled on each one. Reika-sensei ushers them to the kitchen part of the room, which has white Formica counters, beaten up appliances and blonde wood cabinets.

Then a wall of scent hits them, and their well-conditioned stomachs immediately rumble. Garlic, the scent of baked bread, something tangy, and cooked poultry.

"Dinner's ready. We'll eat at the kitchen table."

She plies them with a vinaigrette salad, garlicky buttered bread, freshly cooked green beans, and grilled chicken marinated in something sweet and tangy. They make no sound except to eat, concentrating on the flavors. Reika-sensei does not stock cola in her refrigerator – she can't stand carbonated drinks – but she has a jug of iced green tea that is sweet enough to satisfy even Walter, while Hiko settles for orange juice.

Reika-sensei finishes first, and sits patiently for the three teenagers to eat their fill. Eventually the clink of utensils on ceramic slows, then fades.

"Done? Was it good?"

"Delicious," says Hiko, and Michiyo nods enthusiastically. Walter grunts his agreement.

"Glad you liked it. I've got some good news for you." The trio perks at this. "Team Four has been chosen to participate in the Chuunin Exams, which will be held in Hidden Mist in four months." Michiyo explodes into excited chatter, Hiko grins, and Walter smiles quietly. "Yeah, I thought so. So. We've got three and a half months to get you guys ready. How do you guys propose to go about these preparations?"

"Gather information first." Hiko says promptly, fiddling with his cartilage piercing. "Knowledge is power." Walter nods sharply.

"Should interview Chuunin, and Genin who failed their tests."

"Yeah." Michiyo chips in. "An' if we talk to enough people, we'll find out what a Chuunin Exam typically consists of, and what kind of people pass and don't pass."

"Very good." Reika-sensei approves. "I'll tell you about my own Exam once you've finished compiling information."

"All right." Michiyo says.

"So take… what, perhaps four days to ask around, and on the fifth day we'll put all the information together and devise a training schedule. Sound good to you guys?"

The trio makes noises of agreement. She leans back in her chair, satisfied.

"Now that that's out of the way, I have a proposition for you. Would you like to sign the Summon Contract I own?"

"Cat Summons?" Walter asks in clarification.

"That's right."

"Hnh." He replies. "Yes. Please."

"Sure, why not?" Michiyo says, tilting her head slightly. Hiko just shrugs.

"Of course. Can I get a closer look at the Contract when we are finished signing it?"

"Will you learn from it?" Reika-sensei asks rhetorically, and he smirks back at her. "Then of course you can. I've taught you about Summon Contracts, and Hiko, I expect you've read further on the subject. My contract is different from a Grand Summon Contract, but the same rules apply: once you sign it, you can no longer sign another Contract. I want you to think carefully about my offer, and get back to me tomorrow morning at the usual place. I'll let you meet my Summons before you sign, and they'd have to approve you before you sign as well. We'll gather information about the exam the day after tomorrow. You guys get that all?" The teenagers nod. "Good. Anyways, I made caramel pudding. Anyone up for that? Yeah, I thought so."

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	40. Katzen

I no own, you no sue.

* * *

Reika-sensei is already waiting for them when Team Four arrives at Training Ground 16. Hiko arrives on his own, having to travel all the way from the Hyuuga compound, located at the far end of Ember District, almost touching Flare District. Michiyo has a shorter commute, but only by a bit. As was their habit, she and Walter meet in front of the sandwich shop in Sizzle District, and show up last.

Standing next to Reika-sensei is a Siberian tiger, perhaps ten feet long, shoulder standing at their teacher's eye level. He regards their approach with intelligent green eyes.

"So these are your yearlings?" The tiger rumbles, with what sounds like approval.

"Yeah, they are." She says, reaching up and rubbing carefully around the base of his ears. A loud, deep purr warbles out of his throat. After a moment, his head lifts and Reika-sensei pulls her hand back. "Guys, this is Marbles, my Bond-summon and the Alpha of the spirit-cats, and my closest friend." The three bow their heads in respect and murmur their greetings, a little intimidated by the cat's sheer bulk.

"Pleasure." He murrs, bandy tail swishing a little. "Good to meet the litter and rescuers of my Reika. I see you're somewhat aware of my size, well – I can fix that." A poof of smoke engulfs him and the teenagers sidle back a cautious step. When the smoke clears away, he is gone. No – not gone, shrunk. A loud yowl at their feet redirects their eyes. Standing in the tiger's place is a normal-sized, if slightly larger than usual housecat, a brown tabby with the same luminous green eyes. His stripes do indeed look marbled, and suddenly they understand the name. "Better?" Marbles wonders.

"Whoa! How'd you do that?" Michiyo exclaims, pointing. "I know Summons get big, but they don't change size like that, even I know that!" The cat snickers.

"Reika does not have a grand Summon Contract. There exist two cat contracts: Summon cats, and spirit-cats. The Summon cats live in another dimension, as do most Summon animals. They can grow up to fifty feet tall, and require massive amounts of chakra to summon. Spirit-Cats on the other hand, live far beyond human settlements, in lands wrought by radiation and poison left over from the Reckoning, toxins that kill most living beings. Spirit-cats are the essence of what cats are, and so we can take different forms. Just as the Kyuubi is the essence of all foxes, so we are spirits too. One of our kind, became the Nibi no Nekomata, a demon, and we speak of her no more. Our Contract pulls us from our homes in the Badlands and through an alternate dimension and back to this world, to the Summoner's location, traveling thousands of miles in seconds. We typically take two forms for convenience, a large cat to defend ourselves, and a housecat to escape notice. But we never grow larger than is possible in nature."

"Oh." Michiyo says lamely.

"Why team up with humans?" Walter queries. The cat's tail arches through the air, and the shape of its wave implies a shrug.

"We can't grow catnip in the Badlands. Reika isn't in the Badlands, or any of the other Summoners we've grown fond of through the ages. Also, we can never scratch quite as well with hind legs as humans can with their hands. And who would choose a raw, unseasoned leg of deer over a bowl of clam chowder or a plate of beef tenderloin?"

"That is it?" Hiko says in disbelief, "You fight for us for food, petting, and the feline equivalent of an illicit substance?" Again, that lazy wave of tail.

"Well, why not? Do we need a complicated reason?" Marbles sits on his haunches. "Enough chit-chat. I want to see how you perform, both individually and as a team. I'm not entrusting my family to you if you're going to put them in danger through your own incompetence."

Walter growls at this, but he is settled by Reika-sensei's hand on his shoulder. She gives it a gentle squeeze before releasing him.

"We'll demonstrate your abilities with one-on-one sparring, and then all of you against me and Marbles together. Kapeesh?" She waits for their response. "All right then. Hiko and Walter, you first."

She leads them through the spars, and they're panting and sweaty by the time it's time for the three on two spar. Marbles transforms into his tiger form once more. Reika-sensei leaps on her Summon-bond's back, and pulls out a sickle-and-chain. When she hollers the signal for the fight to commence, the teenagers are more than a little nervous.

It's hard. Brutal. Team Four has always known Reika-sensei's specialty is intelligence gathering. She can hold her own against all three of them, but from what they've seen her accomplish in a fight, she doesn't quite measure up to most Jounin, at least in battle. Now? It's easy to see why she made the rank. Alone, she may not measure up, but with her summon-bond, she crushes them.

Marbles is a flash of burnt orange fur, strikes that at one point sends Michiyo flying into a tree with a crash. And through it all, his claws are sheathed.

When she finally done with them, she calls them to a stop, and grins at her students, panting.

"Jounin, kiddos." Is all she says. Reika-sensei leans against the massive tiger and looks up at him as he looms over her shoulder. "So Marbles, what do you think? Good enough?"

"Just." He shakes his pelt out, and yawns. "They'll do. I know of ten kittens, four-months old, who wish to work with humans. They are old enough to be bonded, and they should be able to speak human and change shape in several months. Reika, I will bring them to your home tomorrow so you may choose three kittens from the group. They can be summon-bonded in five days once your students have gathered their intelligence."

"That's fine, buddy." The tiger gives her a great lick up her cheek and she pushes his great head away, laughing.

"Welcome to the family, kittens." Marbles sighs, "You look after us, we look after you. I expect to meet with you once a week to discuss your progress, both with your spirit-cat partners and as shinobi. I think dinner at Reika's would do nicely." The Jounin rolls her eyes.

"Yeah, go ahead and invite yourself over, hmm?"

"Apologies." The big cat says unrepentantly.

"_Riii_ght."

"Then if it's all set, I will take my leave of you."

"See you later, bud." Marbles nods at Reika-sensei. He rears onto his haunches and slaps his huge paws together, disappearing in a cloud of smoke.

"Weird," Michiyo comments. Walter shrugs.

"Ehnk."

Hiko just shakes his head.

"So Reika-sensei, your place in five days?" The thirteen-year old asks.

"That's correct. My place, at six. You may begin your information gathering this afternoon."

"Got it." Walter says with a nod. "Will gather intelligence as team today," he informs his teammates, and they nod in acknowledgment. Reika-sensei smiles at her second-in-command, then demands,

"Well? Get to it!"

They do.

* * *

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	41. Blood Pact

I no own, you no sue.

Really, really not happy with this chapter. Too indulgent. Still, kittens!

* * *

It's ten at night by the time Team Four have played with all ten kittens and made their choices. The young cats come in all sizes and colors. Hiko selects a red and white long-haired kitten that Reika-sensei says is called a Turkish Van, and he names her 'Prawn.' Michiyo chooses a sturdy seal-pointed female Tonkinese, with chestnut fur and dark chocolate paws, face, and tail. The kunoichi names her bond-summon Pancake.

Many of the kittens are quite enamored of Walter's dexterous fingers, but he finally settles upon a very affectionate, if highly strung, petite shorthaired mutt. She is a cross between a tabby and a tortoiseshell cat, which looks a bit like someone has taken two pelts, ginger tabby and brown tabby, and stitched them together. Her tail is unusually bushy, and striped like a raccoon's. Walter looks at her, and as she looks back, a thunderous rumble of a purr rises from her dainty throat. He turns over different names in his head. Literary names, variations of color and types of fox. He settles on a food name to go with his teammates' cats. Nutmeg. A spice, rare and precious, with a little bite, and a warm flavor. Walter offers the name to her, and she agrees with a nod, green-brown eyes just slightly mismatched, a shy look of interest in them. She tucks her tail around her feet self-consciously.

In charge of the kittens comes a sleek brown cat named Triscuit. She is to be Team Four's collective summon, she informs them, to guide them in working with their summon-bond kittens, and in charge of training the three kittens to battle readiness.

"Good choices, everyone." Triscuit says briskly, and nods at the seven kittens who were not chosen. They vanish in a disgruntled cloud of smoke. "Let's sign the contract now, shall we?" Reika-sensei unrolls a thick scroll that was laying on the kitchen counter.

"We'll be using blood for ink, kiddos." She informs her students, pulling out a brush, bowl, and a razor from a cupboard. "Blood from both humans and cats."

"Six of my cohorts have already agreed to be summoned by you just on the strength of Marbles' opinion. If you'll excuse me…" Triscuit makes a horrible gagging, wheezing noise, and coughs up a tiny corked glass vial filled with blood. "Pardon me. That contains the blood of Waffle, Hugo, Raven, Pepper, Oliver, and Mocha." Reika-sensei picks the vial up with a dishtowel and empties it into the ink bowl.

"Glad that's taken care of. Those are some good cats to begin with," She mutters, and offers the razor to Walter. He grasps it firmly and draws it carefully over the back of his hand to create a very shallow cut. He squeezes the edges to make a few drops of blood well up and splash into the bowl. He passes the razor to Michiyo, who copies him, and adds her own blood to the bowl, as does Hiko.

Prawn, Pancake, and Nutmeg are not pleased to find that they need to add their blood as well, but grudgingly cooperate as their new partners shave a little fur off their front leg and draw a cut on the bald spot with the blade.

Once the blood is collected, Reika-sensei has them dip their fingers in the mix of blood, applying bloody fingertips to the scroll, then signing their name and their feline partner's as well. Then the ichor is applied to their kitten's paw, and Nutmeg, Pancake and Prawn each press a paw print to the parchment. Finally, Reika-sensei and Triscuit sign their approval of the new partnerships.

Reika-sensei sets the scroll aside on the counter to dry, and washes the bowl, brush and razor in the kitchen sink. Triscuit shakes her pelt briskly.

"Finally finished. Now. We're all positively famished. Grub would be appreciated, yes?" Reika-sensei smiles.

"Is kibble acceptable, or would you like something out of a can?"

"Kibble if you please, it has less sugar and fat. Much healthier than wet food." The brown cat says primly.

"I have three varieties. You want turkey with rice, tuna, or lamb?"

"Whoa, Reika-sensei!" Michiyo exclaims, "Why do you have so much cat food in your place?" Their teacher shrugs.

"My best friend is a cat. Marbles is over all the time, and he prefers to eat small, so we can get the best bang for our buck. Not to mention my other summons."

"Other summons?" Walter prods.

"Yes. You see, a summoner typically begins with one cat, and then expands to using other cats for specific tasks. You might be able to fight best with your partner, but they may not be good at codes, or surveillance and trapping – that's Triscuit's specialty – or even tracking, and so on. And-"

"_I._ Would like turkey." Triscuit interrupts frostily, drawing the topic back to food. "And we're all hungry. Prawn and Nutmeg want lamb. Pancake would like tuna."

"Yes, fine." Reika-sensei sighs, and heads to a cupboard, which when the teenagers look, is full of cat food.

Once the kibble has been doled out into four brightly colored bowls and set on the long kitchen table (the cats are supposed to eat at the table with everyone else), and the four cats are happily crunching down kibble, Reika-sensei pulls the food Michiyo had cooked herself and brought over out of the oven. It's lasagna and cream of broccoli soup. Both dishes are delicious. For desert there are some particularly good spiced oatmeal cookies, with chocolate chips in them. They are a unanimous success.

Team Four tidies up after the meal, and parts ways, each teenager leaving with a kitten scampering at their heels. Triscuit washes herself quickly, then looks up at Reika-sensei.

"I think that's enough for today. Goodnight, Reika Gintaki." Reika-sensei smiles.

"Goodnight Triscuit. See you tomorrow at the training ground." Triscuit harrumphs to herself, and swishes her tail.

"Yes. Tomorrow." She vanishes in a noisy cloud of smoke, which fills the apartment and leaves the Jounin coughing. She opens a window.

It's cold out, winter settling in.

Several floors down, Walter kitten-proofs his apartment. That done, he settles into a battered couch that has clearly seen better days and curls up with a book. Nutmeg insists on sitting on his lap, tiny paws kneading rhythmically but without a hint of claws.

That night, and every night afterward, she sleeps on his pillow, nose buried in his short hair.

* * *

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	42. Getting an Education

I no own, you no sue. Merry Christmas!

* * *

With all the training Team Four is doing, the months fly by. They prepare strategies, plans of attack, develop new jutsu and team formations. Team Four and what they will try to accomplish at the Chuunin Exams are too valuable to risk leaving the village. And there are very few C-rank missions kept within the village. At first they complete a D-rank mission every day, but the kind of training they're doing works best with several full days followed by a day off from training to recuperate, instead of working a few hours every day.

So the Hokage provides them with a different opportunity. It's Walter's idea, and he heartily approves. And so, Team Four begins to tutor Academy students who are either doing poorly, or come from civilian families. This tutoring is given three days a week after school. The work is tedious, but often rewarding, and to top it off, they receive a regular salary. A small salary, yes, but marginally more than they'd made with five D-ranks a week. In this way, Walter is able to scrounge enough money to stay afloat.

Meanwhile, Reika-sensei is teaching seminars in Konoha's own tiny ninja college, while her own students are busy. Hidden Leaf College is a supplement for ninja who have finished their apprenticeships and either made Chuunin and above, or have not hit their promotion deadline and found steady careers for themselves. At the College, ninja can take a month or three of classes and earn nin-degrees in such fields as medical techniques, psychology, encryption, strategy, and so on.

Surprisingly, it is Walter who teaches best. His words of praise are short but well-earned, his criticisms regular but instructive. He is more patient than Michiyo, and less arrogant than Hiko. A better listener than both of them, deliberate and methodical. Once the Academy students get past the dour scowl that is their tutor's normal expression, they hang on his words, attentive. He acquaints them with the reference desk librarians of Flicker and Hearth District, recommends books to them: mostly nonfiction, but he even recommends some fictional novels that will give the civilian students a better idea of the ninja world.

The program is surprisingly effective, and seventy-five percent of the students Team Four tutor experience an improvement in their grades and performance. When the Third Hokage calls them in for an evaluation of their progress training-wise, he mentions he is impressed with the progress Walter's program has made as well.

"This work you have done with the Academy students, more than any fight in a stadium, tells me you are ready to be Chuunin and lead a team." He says, and the three teenagers flush from his praise. "Now it's just a matter of taking the Exam and showing off your abilities to the proctors." After a few more suggestions for their training, he lends Hiko a book on sealing from his own library (he's not called 'the Professor' without reason and is pleased to cultivate a future Seal-master). The books are only C-ranked, of course. Then he dismisses them, and sends them on their way.

Team Four's kitten-partners grow older. Nutmeg establishes herself as affectionate and spirited, but also silly. She doesn't think much of Walter's teammates, but she adores the surly redhead. Nutmeg sleeps on his bed, eats from his hand, seeks out his company when they're not training separately or together, and develops a knack for genjutsu and stealth. Walter is ready for the day when she can speak like a human, but that's five months away, and the Chuunin Exam is coming up in two months.

Hiko's cat Prawn is feisty and just as fond of seals as his master is, while Michiyo's kitten Pancake is far more sensible than her partner, and has a way with setting traps.

It's all coming together.

A week before they are due to leave for the Chuunin Exams, is March 21st. Walter's fifteenth birthday. As is their tradition, there is no training on a teammate's birthday. Henna Kujikoto from the Flicker District Library reference desk has not forgotten him, and he gets a couple of bookstore coupons she's saved for him and a small bag of sugar leaf candies.

Reika-sensei and his teammates take him out to a steakhouse for dinner that night, and present him with presents before desert arrives. Reika-sensei's gift is a set of new kunai and shuriken. She also promises to use his money to buy a book or scroll of B-rank jutsu under her clearance level. Hiko gifts him with a meticulous seal worked in leather that will painlessly draw a single drop of blood from any finger wiped over the seal – it has a little clip that will attach itself to a belt – making summoning Nutmeg or any of the other summon-cats much faster, and painless. The seal will erase any worry of an open wound or infection. Michiyo's gift is more elaborate.

"It has to be, see. Cuz I'm your girlfriend." She explains when Walter protests at the quantity of presents she's giving to him, and rolls her eyes. A storage scroll that contains a flameless, chakra-powered cylinder food cooker, a skillet/saucepan to match the cooker, and some seasoning mixes in travel-size jars. The storage scroll itself is pocket-sized. Her gift is perfect for any cooking in the wild, and is given in anticipation of a survival test in the Chuunin Exams. Michiyo also vows to teach him how to create the sweets and cookies – some her own recipe – of which he is particularly enamored – after the Chuunin Exams.

"Thank you." Walter says gruffly, pink, and his teammates and teacher all smile.

"Aw, don't mention it. Happy Birthday, Walter." Michiyo grins from where she's sitting next to him, and reaches for his collar, "Now, ever heard of birthday kisses?" She's leaning in, and, indecent! Public! These kinds of things should be kept private!

The waitress arrives with large, warm slices of death-by-chocolate cake, complete with whipped cream and vanilla bean ice cream. Arrives just in time, and Walter gently pushes Michiyo away from him before she can do any damage. She flings herself back into her own chair with a dissatisfied grunt, thwarted.

"I'll get you my pretty; and your little cat too." She mutters, and Walter shrugs expressively.

"Later." He mutters, and digs into his slice of cake, messily.


	43. Chuunin Exams!

The Chuunin Exams

The Chuunin Exams are to be held in Hidden Mist.

Hidden Leaf sends three teams to Mist, Team Four, Team One (which comprises of Kara DeWitt, Klika Kadiri, and Ken Riki, led by Bill Brady), and the Team that has the Ino-Shika-Cho lineup.

Exam One (Thirty-six teams)

Teams cross a field of traps, in twenty minutes or less.

Team Four summons Pancake (a summon housecat) and Triscuit (a giant lioness summon) to sniff out and help disarm the traps. The pair of summons are promised a good brushing and a dinner of cheese, bacon, and clam chowder.

Team Four completes this test within ten minutes.

Exam Two (Twenty-three teams)

Determine the false teammate.

Four months previously, Walter decided that Team Four needed a way to confirm each other's identity in case of an imposter. Michiyo wanted a secret handshake, but Hiko pointed out that they should just use the code-seals on their wrists to secretly confirm identities. Michiyo pouted, and insisted they still have flashy secret handshakes to throw off imposters, or in case of chakra depletion. So they came up with three secret handshakes, referred to as 'Easy,' 'Medium,' and 'Hard.'

The handshake quickly determines that Hiko is the hidden imposter. The imposter doesn't even know what 'Medium' is, and Hiko is allowed to return to the team.

Exam Three (fifteen teams left)

Held in the Deadland Swamps of Hidden Mist. One third of the teams are given scrolls, the other two thirds none. To pass this exam each team must bring one scroll to an old bunker in the middle of the swampland. But there is a catch – all teams must remain within the swamp, and the bunker's doors will only open at the end of the week.

Team Four is not given a scroll, but they quickly obtain one from a Hidden Rock team. Hiko cheats and seals the scroll into a seal on his wrist. They present their scroll to the proctor, and it is blood-stained. After getting a scroll, they set out to terminate the other two teams from Rock, as well as some other teams that try to take their scroll away. They kill four teams total, beat five away. At one point, Walter is captured in a water jutsu, and drowns. Hiko revives him with mouth-to-mouth while Michiyo holds the enemies at bay. Walter is undamaged, but is unable to forget the feel of Hiko's mouth on his – better than his rare kisses with Michiyo.

During the Exam Chouza Akimichi dies.

Leaf Team Ino-Shika-Cho

Inoichi Yamanaka

Shikaku Nara

Chouza Akimichi – dies in third Exam.

After killing off the Rock Genin, Team Four allies with a Mist team they met earlier - Team Mirage.

Kiriko Shibuya is the genin leader of Team Mirage. She is a poison specialist, and is patient and level-headed. Yatsuo Kaguya has a bloodlimit that allows him to fight with his own bones. He has a very short temper. Mira Gintaki uses mud ninjutsu and kenjutsu – she is distantly related to Reika Gintaki, whose grandparents came from Mist.

Kiriko takes a liking to Walter, proposes an alliance with Team Four, and wary, Hiko draws up a contract for both teams to sign. Once the sealed contract is signed, the two teams use earth and fire jutsu to excavate a cave in a hill. They bunker up for the next four days, only leaving to hunt, guard, or do the necessaries. Team Mirage never pulls anything funny, and we discover Kiriko and Mira are a lesbian couple, which fascinates Walter, as they both seem decent and skilled, yet are sexually deviant. At the end of the week, the two teams struggle to the bunker, and pass.

Final Round (four teams left)

One on one combat.

Here are the teams who made it to the final round:

Sand Team Quartz

Kentaro Hokori, Puppeteer, puppets. Genjutsu type. Earth type.

Looks: bushy brown hair, black eyes. Tall, spindly limbs.

Dress: dark brown bodysuit, wooden mask over face. Wears hitae-ite on arm.

Isogi Sokonao, poison user, senbon user. Ninjutsu type. Fire type.

Looks: spiky black hair, brown eyes, handsome. Tall.

Dress: Baggy tan flak jacket, tan trousers. Wears hitae-ite on his forehead.

Yomi Kenka, fire user, giant shuriken user. Ninjutsu type. Fire type.

Looks: short brown hair, square face, medium height. Brown eyes.

Dress: Dull brown robe, red sash. Dark brown baggy trousers. Wears her hitae-ite on her forehead.

Mist Team Mirage

Kiriko Shibuya, water type, poison user. Ninjutsu type. Has a deadly pair of poisoned Neko-te.

Looks: Curly brunette hair to her back, elfin face, gold eyes. The kanji for 'touch' is tattooed on her neck below her right ear. Earlobes are double-pierced

Dress: teal water country tight sweater, black short-trousers. She wears two loops of bandoliers that contain numerous pouches for her poisons, antidotes, darts, and needles. Wears her hitae-ite on her forehead.

Yatsuo Kaguya, bone user, bone daggers. Ninjutsu type. Earth type.

Looks: White hair, zig-zag part. Light grey eyes, red dots above his eyebrows. Earlobes are double-pierced.

Dress: blue water-country turtleneck, baggy brown trousers, loose over-shirt. Wears his hitae-ite around his neck.

Mira Gintaki, mud user, sword user. Earth type, Kenjutsu type.

Looks: spiky silver hair, brown eyes, catlike face. Short. Earlobes are double-pierced.

Dress: navy water country turtleneck, navy leggings, wears a burnt orange and forest green patterned kimono robe over it. Wears her hitae-ite around her forehead.

Leaf Team One

Kara DeWitt, wind type, katana and wakizashi. Trap specialist, kenjutsu.

Looks: Short, pretty, freckled. Red hair to her waist, green eyes.

Dress: Short silver dress, blue mesh armlets and fishnet tights. She wears her hitae-ite on her forehead.

Ken Riki, earth type, favors a pair of sai. Trap specialist.

Looks: wavy blonde hair, gorgeous, scrumptious, grey eyes. Tall.

Dress: brown leather jacket, blue denim short-trousers, white tee-shirt. Wears his hitae-ite around his right shoulder.

Klika Kadiri, water type, brass knuckles. Taijutsu specialist.

Looks: mousy brown chin length hair, purple eyes. Medium height.

Dress: blue long-sleeved shirt, purple leggings. Wears her hite-ite on her forehead.

**Round One**

Fight One

Mira Gintaki (Mist) vs. Michiyo Kagami (Leaf)

Mira fights mostly with earth jutsu, which take a while to activate, and are meant to restrain her opponents so she can finish them off. She holds her opponents off with her sword. She attempts this strategy – Michiyo engages her in a katana vs. kodachi holdoff. The earth restraining technique gets Michiyo in Mira's grasp, but Michiyo breaks out with an electric technique and gets the better of Mira by pasting a movement-based explosive tag on Mira's face, forcing her to remain still or be blown to bits.

Mira surrenders.

Fight Two

Kentaro Hokori (Sand) vs. Yomi Kenka (Sand)

This fight is an interesting result of what happens when two ninja fight each other too often. They begin with pitting Kentaro's genjutsu against Yomi's flaming giant shuriken, but Yomi doesn't fall for the illusions. Kentaro pulls out a few puppets, but before she can burn them, he surrenders, as he knows if the fight escalates, there will be a fatality. Yomi moves on to the next round.

Fight Three

Walter Kovacs (Leaf) vs. Kara DeWitt (Leaf)

Kara specializes in kenjutsu and trap-setting. Unfortunately for her, Walter is best in fights. He gets her temper going, gets her to drain most of her chakra, fending off sword attacks with knuckle-duster trench knives. He finally wrenches her sword away, and pins her to the ground with a knife to her throat and a knife at her gut.

Walter is declared the winner by the proctor.

Fight Four

Hiko Hyuuga (Leaf) vs. Yatsuo Kaguya (Mist)

Hiko initially seems worse off, until he pulls out premade seals – explosive and shock tags. He spends most of his time running away, formulating a seal which dramatically lessens bone density. He allows Yatsuo to pin him on his back, then slaps the seal on the boy, and kicks the older boy's legs, breaking both of them.

Hiko is declared the winner, to a stunned audience.

Fight Five

Ken Riki (Leaf) vs. Klika Kadiri (Leaf)

Klika immediately surrenders. Ken Riki moves on to the next round.

Fight Six

Kiriko Shibuya (Mist) vs. Isogi Sokonao (Sand)

An interesting fight, between two poison users. Isogi uses his fire techniques to create poison smoke, while Kiriko uses water and mist to apply poison. Isogi prefers senbon, while Kiriko uses neko-te. Ultimately, Kiriko is physically superior, faster, stronger, with more stamina, and better taijutsu. They both wear gas masks during the fight. Isogi collapses, and Kiriko is declared the winner. Both are treated for poisoning, but Isogi dies before they can heal him. Kiriko's stamina is lessened by the effects of the poison.

**Round Two**

Fight One

Michiyo Kagami (Leaf) vs. Yomi Kenka (Sand)

Yomi taunts Michiyo, lights her shuriken on fire, and throws it at Michiyo, who ducks and is missed. Yomi throws a second shuriken just as Michiyo hurls her kodachi at Yomi and stabs her in the chest with the short sword, then throws herself to the ground to avoid the second shuriken. Yomi dies of massive blood loss. The bloodthirsty Mist crowd cheers.

Michiyo is the winner.

Fight Two

Walter Kovacs (Leaf) vs. Hiko Hyuuga (Leaf)

Walter and Hiko start out with long-range attacks, then move up to traps. Walter bulldozes right through one of Hiko's sustaining some lacerations on his legs, but catching Hiko off guard. They engage in hand-to-hand fighting, with Hiko sealing many of Walter's tenketsu. Hiko is knocked on his butt from one blow, and starts laughing, because he's out of chakra, and Walter clearly has the better of him. He surrenders, reopens Walter's tenketsu, and heals them both on the field.

Walter goes on to the next round.

Fight Three

Ken Riki (Leaf) vs. Kiriko Shibuya (Mist)

Knowing Kiriko is a poison expert, Ken flees from her, but is grazed by a shuriken. Kiriko sends him into a panic by putting him under a genjutsu that mimics poison symptoms, then tells him he's poisoned (by both a contact-poison handshake and the shuriken) and only has twenty minutes without an antidote to win. Terrified, he surrenders, and then she tells him she'd faked the poisoning entirely.

Kiriko wins. Because there are twelve particpants, and the nature of the name draw, Kiriko is given a by into the final round. Her opponent will be decided by the fight in round three.

**Round Three**

Michiyo Kagami (Leaf) vs. Walter Kovacs (Leaf)

An all-out fight between a couple. By this time, the Leaf and Fire Country members are outraged that Walter has fought three battles with all Leaf opponents.

Michiyo and Walter simultaneously whip out a genjutsu – Michiyo casts a genjutsu that makes Walter think the fight is over, while Walter casts a sleep illusion on her. They both break out of it after three minutes struggle. They test each other with their favored weapons – her kodachi and his knives, then move on to water jutsu. Michiyo throws a kunai with a shock tag into a puddle Walter is standing in, shocking him badly. He manages to stay conscious, quite a feat. He clashes with her, again, and they pull out their best jutsu – Michiyo a lightning technique, Walter quickly countering with wind, and the nature of the two elements results in a massive backlash, sending Michiyo flying into the stadium wall. She is badly concussed, but manages to stay on her feet. Exhausted, the pair fight sloppily at hand-to-hand, too disoriented to do much more – just as Michiyo seems to get the upper hand, she passes out, and Walter almost cuts her throat accidentally as he hadn't expected her to fall that way. He catches her before she hits the ground, and is declared the winner.

Rather than moving directly to the final round, Walter and Kiriko are given half an hour to recuperate before the fight.

**Round Four**

Walter Kovacs (Leaf) vs. Kiriko Shibuya (Mist)

Both Walter and Kiriko are feeling the affects of their fights. Walter's muscles have been shocked, while Kiriko feels sluggish from her poisoning. Both are formidable opponents and the audience is very stoked about the fight. At the start of the fight, Kiriko takes a soldier pill. Walter doesn't believe in such stimulants, and fights without help. Her neko-te break on his knuckle-dusters, and she refuses to poison him, fearing in his tired state he would die. They are down to ninjutsu and taijutsu, but ultimately the soldier pill makes all the difference, and Walter is too slow to escape Kiriko's finishing move. She knocks him out, and is declared the winner.

In the end, Kiriko Shibuya, Yatsuo Kaguya, and all the members of Team Four are promoted to Chuunin.

Yatsuo's promotion is due to local favoritism.

Kiriko was promoted because of her use of trickery, alternate shows of mercilessness against foes, and mercy to her perceived allies, as well as demonstration of her mastery of taijutsu and poisons.

Walter was promoted for sheer skill and dogged stamina.

Michiyo is promoted almost entirely for her brutality and creativity.

Hiko is promoted entirely on the basis of his on-the-fly sealwork. He is given points for knowing he was outmatched.


	44. Beginning of the End: Summary Part 1

Okay, at this point I feel the fic has degenerated into nothing more than a clichéd fix-it, and Michiyo has totally turned into a Mary-Sue. She's nothing like me, but I recognize that she's a fun character to write, and thus still falls into that category of author self-indulgence. Nonetheless, I will post what I had in mind. You are warned.

* * *

Team Four returns to Konoha to be promoted. Kara has a hissy fit about not being promoted. More and more, Walter can't forget what Hiko's lips felt like when he performed mouth-to-mouth. He tells Reika-sensei that privately, and she tells him she thinks he's homosexual. He can't get it out of his head, dreams and enjoys it far more than he does actually kissing Michiyo. She offers to break up with him but remain friends, which he agrees to with great relief. Michiyo is a little disappointed, but they remain best friends. Walter tries to express his feelings to Hiko, only to be shot down. Hiko is a little colder to him at first, then becomes his friend and teammate once more.

ANBU approaches Walter and Michiyo. They are interested in having agents who are good at collecting intelligence, while still secretly having high battle ability. This means Michiyo and Walter might not be officially be promoted to Jounin in the future, in order to fly under the radar.

Both accept, and Walter and Michiyo begin training for mixed-ops duty. Michiyo will be used in intelligence, undercover, and in the far future on the Shadow-Guard, the ANBU who protect the Hokage. Walter will have far more variety in his service – at first in Intel, interrogation, combat, and Hunters. In the farther future, assassination and Shadow-Guard.

Hiko enrolls in the medic training program Tsunade created, then secures an apprenticeship with a seals master. His studies take him out of Konoha for several years.

With Team Four broken up, Reika-sensei takes on a new team – Team 9, which consists of a boy, a girl, and the genius Adrian Veidt. Before too long, with the Third Secret Shinobi War still boiling along, the boy is crippled, the girl quits, and Adrian has Reika-sensei all to himself.

Adrian, ever meddling, sets Reika-sensei up on a date with Hollis Mason. The two Jounin take to each other, and are quickly very serious about each other. Adrian continues to be amazing, and Reika-sensei lets him sign the Cat Contract – his partner is a lynx spirit named Bubastis.

Michiyo and Walter begin training for ANBU.

Michiyo is 'Blackbird.' With a corresponding mask.

Walter takes the name 'Rorschach,' and takes to his mask like no other ANBU has before. Not wanting the name his mother gave him, and to escape the prejudice of many villagers, he pretends Walter Kovacs and Rorschach are two separate people. As Walter, he continues to tutor Academy students in the program the Sandaime created. When he is Rorschach off-duty, he wears a mask made of a chakra-sensitive mask that looks like blots of black and white. He quickly develops a fearsome reputation in ANBU as a smart, ruthless, dogged bastard with crazed intuition, and a weak spot for children. He is promoted to captain of Hunter squad 6 at age 17.

Rorschach is quite eloquent, unlike Walter.

Described by others: "He was practically _made_ to be ANBU."

Daniel Dreiburg was born to a civilian family, but always dreamed of being a ninja. He convinces his mother to enroll him in the Academy, and his father deeply disapproves. He meets Walter at eight, when he was struggling along. Dan graduates at twelve and is put on Team One, under Hollis Mason, with Laurie Blake and Jon Osterman. Laurie is a very tomboyish, foul-mouthed girl with a love of animals. Jon Osterman's body is covered in blue-inked seals – that should give him the ability to predict the future, put on him by his crazy, seal-master father at birth. However, the experiment apparently failed. Jon is very intelligent, but apparently emotionless, and privy to large amounts of money from his deceased grandfather. He lets others tell him what to do with his life. Dan immediately latches onto Hollis as a positive father figure, and develops a deep, abiding crush on Laurie, who has in turn set out to make Jon her boyfriend, rather than her rival, Janey Slater.

Dan likes to tinker with his weapons – he is good at taijutsu and has a delicate hand at genjutsu. Ninjutsu, not so much. He idolizes Hollis.

Team One's Chuunin Exams are held in Hidden Cloud. He makes Chuunin at age 15 on his second test.

In celebration, Hollis offers his students to sign the Owl Summons Contract, but the terms are so rigorous only Dan accepts. The owls immediately take to Dan, even the picky Archimedes, the patriarch of the Owls.

Dan makes Jounin at 18. He joins ANBU at age 19.

Laurie finally wins the battle with Janey, and Jon begins to date her. She is content to live with him after making Chuunin. Jon makes Jounin, and gets his own team.

Dan dates Leslie for a while, but she is too loose for him.

Dan's ANBU persona is Barn Owl.

ANBU training is very rigorous, and Dan makes it through with average marks. After a year of moving from combat division, to hunter-nin stauts, Dan is assigned to the All-Arounds, a squad led by the mysterious Rorschach, who is three years older than Dan. The All-Arounds are a team of ANBU who can handle any of the six fields ANBU covers. Rorschach has been in ANBU for 7 years when Dan joins. Rorschach was once a Captain of the foremost Hunter-nin team, but suffered a mental breakdown with a kidnapping case, and was demoted to captain the All-Arounds.

Dan's first solo assassination mission nearly breaks him – he is sent to Blackbird's (Michiyo) tender care. Blackbird is still in ANBU, mostly as Shadow-Guard, Intel, and interrogation. She is very good at profiling comrades. The Hokage enjoys her company, cooking, and opinions. Blackbird keeps tabs on Dan's mental condition afterwards, and suggests he commit some free time to community service, to make him feel he does more than kill others, then gives him the card for the Sapling Tutors program, a program that provides free tutoring for civilian children in the Academy. He tries it, and meets Walter Kovacs for a second time. They get along well enough, and Dan tries to open the older man up a little, trying to hang at a bar or join the card games of some of Dan's coworkers. Walter stonily declines, and Dan backs off, confused and a little hurt.

Since age sixteen, Dan has been aware of his bisexuality. Rorschach, though distant, seems to get along best with Dan, who develops an abiding crush on his leader.

At age 22, Michiyo refuses to marry any of the suitors her clan presents her with. When they push the matter, she disowns herself, takes her mother's maiden name, and becomes Michiyo Ashi.

Michiyo's older sister Mikoto marries Fugaku Uchiha.

The war with Hidden Stone ends.

To their surprise, the Fourth orders Dan, Walter, and several others in ANBU to travel to the capital city of the Lightning Country and infiltrate as college students. Dan is to study in engineering and technology, whilst Walter is to study teaching. Dan has already cobbled together several devices now in frequent use by ANBU – the Hokage wishes Konoha to have its very own shinobi inventor. Walter (the Hokage knows of his dual lives) is to rehaul the Academy system with what he learns – he is suddenly more valuable as an educator than an ANBU captain – the Sapling Tutor program now regularly turns out students that rise to the top of their class. The trip serves two purposes – intelligence gathering in a foreign country, and also gaining ninja educated in the foremost university in the Elemental nations.

Dan and Walter are roommates. Dan is worried it will ruin their tenuous friendship, but Walter grows on him, and before he knows it – he's torn between his long interest in Rorschach and in Walter, who is far more available, for all his flaws.

Of course, Walter has been interested in Dan since Dan joined ANBU three years ago. He'd never make a move as Rorschach, who is considered cool, and simply assumed Dan wouldn't be interested in homely little Walter. Years ago, he vented this to Michiyo, who is still his best friend and free therapist. Ever-conniving, and true to her Kagami matchmaking blood, she'd tried to subtly aim Dan in Walter's direction. Dan finally propositions Walter on the third year in the college, and after taking months to think on it, Walter starts a relationship with Dan. They move forward so very slowly Dan wonders if it's a relationship in name only, but they have sex in their fourth and final year of college.

_Cue a better version of 'Hallelujah', all you DanxRor fans._

The group of ANBU collegiates graduate and return to Konoha.

Reika-sensei and Hollis-sensei marry, and have a son named Makoto.


End file.
